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Broncos Are Hoarding Underachieving Indiana Quarterbacks

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In keeping with the Cleveland Browns' uprooting of all things quarterbacky, the Broncos have traded for former Notre Dame standout Brady Quinn in exchange for a curious amalgamation of fullback Peyton Hillis and two late-round draft picks.

Quinn now joins the epicurean Kyle Orton on the depth chart, giving the Mile High City two signal callers from Indiana colleges. Too bad Antwaan Randle El went back to the Steelers, otherwise the Broncos could've gone for the Hoosier trifecta.

Dear Penthouse, I was a Heisman contender at a small Midwestern university, and I never thought something like being traded for a conditional pick would happen to me…

You may remember the Broncos from either their 6-0 start or their 2-8 finish last season, which led to them staying home for the postseason. But in the end, the Orton-for-Jay Cutler trade worked out for Denver, reaffirming the Duke brothers "nature vs. nurture" experiment. Cutler fizzled in Chicago, and Orton didn't do half bad. So maybe Quinn has a chance to be Not John Elway and still make the playoffs.

As for the Browns, perhaps they should start wearing name tags. Because in a few short and frenzied weeks, they went from a depth chart of Derek Anderson and Brady Quinn to Jake Delhomme and Seneca Wallace. Well, that solves that problem. Now all they need are guys who can block, catch, run, defend, and perhaps kick field goals. Then we have ourselves a juggernaut.

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