I don't know if you maybe saw the feature-picture by the name of Outfoxed - Rupert Murdoch's War On Journalism, but if you did, then, like The Duke, you'll be in awe of a stone-cold sonna bitch by the name of Bill O'MotherfuckinReilly
Maybe you see him on the old Fox News Channel, dishing out his "shut your stinking yaps" and such to the kindsa folks who wanna rip some country or other apart. Communists, Talibans, Democrats perhaps. You better hope you ain't one of those types, if you perchance encounter Bill in an alley someplace.
Thank the one God that folks like Bill are on the get-go, ensuring that folks are proper prepared for to deal with any number of pagans and limp-wrists.
In case you didn't know, though, Bill has his finger in a number of pies, most of them smelling vaguely of The Truth. In addition to his radio and television shows, and his hilarious appearances in documentary features, he also engages in a bit of the old "writing", "scribbling", "waxing grammatically". To this end, he's got a couple books out, including a novel, would you believe?
We can only imagine what kindsa glorious mania he conjures therein.
Anyway, his most recent publication is a work by the name of The O'Reilly Factor - For Kids. What this sets out to do, is to tell young 'uns what they need to be doing for to live properly.
To this end, The O'Reilly Factor - For Kids is broken into sections, dealing with the kindsa things a young lad or lady might encounter, and offering Bill's take on the matters at hand. Some of this shit is useful, too, and certainly I'll be putting it into practice in my own life.
Dig this;
"If a kid lies to his parents, he or she will lie to you."
That's helpful as all hell, is what I'm guessing. Seems somewhat lacking in the old "reason", though, if I'm gonna be a million percentages honest. It doesn't elaborate, like maybe talk about if the kid is liable to be beaten senseless unless he or she colors the truth somewhat. Do you still ostracize youngsters who maybe had to pretend they were on a school trip, when in actuality they were crashing at your place, on account of it was the weekend and mom has a habit of kicking the shit out of him when she's a little heavy on the ale?
Bill does, though, talk about adults later on, and makes sure to point out that some folks are unlucky enough to be burdened with truly abominable parents.
Still, don't be lying to them, is what. Otherwise I'll turn my back on you, you Taliban hippy freak.
Also on the subject of friends, Bill advises that "If a classmate cheats in school, he or she will cheat you." Bill obviously knows what he's talking about, since look, he's got a book out and everything, so I'll forget all about how not only The Duke, but numerous Acquaintances De Duke copied off one another left and right, and yet they were there through various hardships, and vice versa, which Bill notes as being a trait of a true friend.
Article comments
1 - Mark Saleski
what we have here is yet more evidence that we need to elect The Duke to the office of president of the united states of america.
can you just imagine the state of the union addresses?
2 - Mark Saleski
oh, and i thought you were makin' that stuff up about "clinton/white house/oral sex"....but then i went on amazon and searched in the book.
and i'll be danged if that aint' a direct quote.
that o'reilly guy. a class act. ;-)
3 - ribbet
holy shit this guy must have goebbles magled hand up his ass with all the sheer bullshit he spews forth from rupert murdocks "WILFRED BRIMLEY XP900 MIND CONTROL SATELLITE" come on him and that one chick that would make the nitch of buchenwald blush have brought the news networks what they want Yellow journalisitic fascist propoganda.... our country is surely going to hell in a giant suv full of discount bibles ... i for one am secretly learning the canadian political system so when they reinstate the draft i can emigrate to canada and use those books for toilet paper... suck it BILDO
4 - Aaman
#3, I for one hope you are secretly learning the English language -and does Bildo refer to the time Bilbo Baggins played for Steely Dan?
5 - Jim Carruthers
So, the lesson we've learned from Bill O'Reilly (who continues to besmirch the name of the finest computer book publisher on the planet right now) is that adults need to lie to kids, and kids, if you go into a party with nothing but adults. that's okay, but you don't get a cut from the video sales. And it's supposed to hurt, goddamn-it, what are you, some little crying pussy?
6 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
hey folks
wow, Mark, that was just what i was thinking. Mind you, i don't think i have the arse for to take the job. Vice president, though, i could manage. Or maybe foreign secretary or some such. I could ask i suppose. I did phone the white house one time asking if i could arrange a tour for the communist party of Ireland. ah, the joys of youth. Incidentally, the fella who answered (a very droll english gent) didn't understand my accent, so hung up. Motherfucker.
ribbet, i'm guessing you're a fan.
Aaman, who the hell knows what the english language is nowadays. its changing all the time, on account of those damn txt msg and such.
jim, thats about the crux of it all. Although i must admit, there were times when Bill made sense. Hard to get a handle on the steel-eyed motherfucker from the book. Best to watch The Factor for a week or two and you'll know all you need to know.
God bless you Bill O'motherfuckinReilly