For far too long, the zombie story has been one-sided... always written from the point of view of the human victim or the hunter. Why don't we ever hear about zombie-related news from a zombie? Well, never fear. All of that is about to change...
Author John Austin has pulled together a handbook to help new zombies adjust to their new position in life (or "unlife"). So Now You're a Zombie: A Handbook for the Newly Undead provides tips on what to avoid (bullets or further head trauma), what to eat and how to hunt for it among other juicy tidbits. If I was a zombie new to undeath, I'd definitely want something like this (if I could still read) as a refresher course in how to proceed and succeed in my unlife.
From the straightforward language and references, to zombie literature and movies, to the detailed and hilarious artwork, I enjoyed each and every page. Sure, we all know that zombies hunger for brains (strict adherence to the "Brain Beach Diet"), but did you know that there are ways to communicate with other zombies to aid in hunting in packs? Did you also know that zombies should avoid humans possessed by demons because demons are unpredictable and "frickin' crazy"?
I learned many indispensable tips for zombie life, such as:
- Killer cyborgs are not edible, but Ronald McDonald is on the "ok-to-eat" list (Zombie Eye Chart, p22)
- "Toe tags are a good indicator that your meal is spoiled." (Body Q&A, p. 29)
- To get into commercial buildings, "Tap on the glass — breathers love that!" (Commercial Buildings, p. 57)
There are many great movie references, such as "Hey, look at me, I'm at Pacific Playland!" (Zombieland) when describing how humans are "Always Drawing Attention to Themselves" (p. 37) and describing "Pretend Zombies" (as in Shaun of the Dead) as easy prey... "Can You Eat Them? Absolutely! These zombie poseurs should be eaten — slowly and alive!"
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