Virtually everyone can relate to those feelings, but her pain and anger exceed a teenager's typical insecurity. One can sense her rage, even now, when she describes undergoing psychotherapy: "It seems that if you are mean or cruel to another kid, that was 'okay' because it was just a normal part of growing up. If you are on the receiving end and allow it to bother you, you were the one who needs help. What kind of logic was that?" (p. 87)
Once Blanco graduated from high school, she experienced success in college and later established her own public relations firm. After deciding to go public with her story, she started a program, It's NOT Just Joking Around, which involves speaking at schools throughout the country and leading seminars for students, teachers, and parents; even what she terms "Adult Survivors of Peer Abuse" attend these sessions, often telling their own stories.
Perhaps the most controversial points in the book occur at the beginning and end, where she describes how she attended her high school reunion. Her former tormentors suddenly become good friends, although she offers few details as to how this suddenly happened. She recommends "facing your fears" by attending such events, although it is doubtful that this advice would benefit all readers. Can former victims really become friends with someone who once relentlessly verbally and physically assaulted them? Blanco neglects to answer this question.
Please Stop Laughing at Me should be read by various groups — students in grades seven through twelve (certain scenes concerning sex, violence, and drugs may not be appropriate for younger audiences) will learn about how seemingly harmless "teasing" can damage someone for life. Bullying victims will relate to Blanco's experiences and perhaps feel comforted by her pronouncement that "we'll graduate soon and the wounds we've sustained at the hands of our classmates will eventually heal and become scars" (p. 212). Parents will not only gain insight into how their bullied children feel, they will learn to spot signs of abuse in their children and to deal effectively with the situation. The book also offers an opportunity for parents and their children to discuss bullying and for parents to teach their children not to victimize others.
Article comments
1 - cdym
Thank you for introducing this book to me...I plan to read it and recommend it to
parents and grandparents and educators...
Civility....that is what is missing more and more from our society...
2 - Kit O'Toole
Thanks for commenting, and you're right--this is an issue that needs to be discussed among as many people as possible.
3 - Susan
I read the 2003 edition of this book, and it really struck a chord. As someone who endured bullying all the way through elementary and junior high (fortunately, high school was less hellish...but only by a fraction), I could relate...but I also have to admit to being thankful that nothing I experienced even came close to some of the physical abuse Blanco suffered.
Even so, too many of today's school administrators do not know what to do about bullying, and teachers are often at a loss, if not outright clueless, about how to aid victims of bullying. This is a serious issue that needs to be taken seriously. We are fortunate that our son's middle school absolutely takes this kind of thing very seriously and nips the (luckily, few) instances of bullying in the bud, but how many schools do nothing, or worse, blame the victims for bringing this on themselves? Blanco's book should be required reading for kids and administrators alike -- kids, so they can recognize themselves as either the bullies or the bullied, and administrators so they recognize the signs and can put a stop to the torment, particularly before it leads to far more serious consequences for the victims.
4 - Kit O'Toole
Absolutely right, Susan, and thanks for commenting. If the book does nothing else but spark productive conversations among parents, kids, teachers, and administrators, it has done an important job.
5 - fcetier
I see attempts to intimidate every Friday night on the football field.
And I feel it from customers every day at work.
When they threaten to call my boss I tell them to be sure and spell my name correctly!
6 - Terionna barlow
I read Ur book in 6th grade now I'm in 7th this book inspired me so much i actually wrote a report on Ur books when I read it to the class they were like why are they doing that to her just because she's different it changed my class a lot cause they don't be bullying and take it really serious so thank you so much for the book