To this day, I still don’t know what my husband sees in me. When I look in the mirror, I see the girl who was reasonably hot in high school, but now isn’t. And even though I know I have a medical reason for being a size 18 and not my normal 10/12, it’s still something that’s not acceptable to my ego, such as it is. There are two things that I do know, though. The first is that my husband loves me very, very much. The second is that he is attracted to me as I am. Why, I have no clue, but he is all the same.
I do have to say, though, that reading Measure by Measure introduced me to a whole subculture that I hadn’t even been aware of and gave me a new appreciation for size acceptance. BBW’s (big beautiful women) and FA’s (fat admirers) really do exist and have their own groups, Web sites, and publications. You can be overweight and beautiful to yourself and others – two things I used to think were mutually exclusive.
The new shows, More to Love and Drop Dead Diva are also helping with my view of beauty in larger women. Seeing how other women who are around my age or even younger are being shown as beautiful and desirable, and also having their stories of hardship also shared, make me feel like I have more realistic images to base my own subconscious images off of.
I think that’s why I liked Measure by Measure so much. It’s real in its honesty about relationships and being fat, and gives those of us who have been there a nod in mainstream media.
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