When I heard that I Love You, Beth Cooper had been written by Larry Doyle, who worked on The Simpsons and Beavis & Butt-Head (two shows that I grew up on), I decided I had to read it. I didn't even bother to find out what it was about.
It turns out to be a story chronicling the graduation night of several students. A "coming of age" tale, if you will, but without all that sappy "finding yourself" crap. Denis Cooverman, class valedictorian, debate team champion, and all-around nerd, decides that his commencement speech is the perfect time to profess his love for Beth Cooper, the prettiest, most popular girl in school. Denis might be a math whiz, but he has absolutely no social skills whatsoever (during the same speech, Denis also revealed at the deepest, darkest secrets of many of his fellow graduates. He didn't name names, but everyone figured it out). During a brief, awkward encounter over post-commencement punch and cookies, Denis invites Beth to a non-existent grad party at his house, and nearly gets beaten up by Kevin, her Army ape boyfriend.
Denis hurries home to throw together a makeshift "party" with Rich, Denis's maybe-gay, maybe-not, best (and only) friend. Denis is shocked when Beth shows up, best friends Cammy and Treece in tow. He doesn't care that they are only there to make Kevin jealous, or to teach his similarly simian buddies a lesson for man-handling Cammy and Treece. All Denis cares about is that Beth Cooper, his dream girl, is at his house.
Unfortunately, Kevin and his buddies follow the girls to Denis's house, and so begins a wild, destructive evening: destruction of property, destruction of skin and bones, and destruction of illusions. Over the course of the evening, the quintet have an adventure that would make Ferris Bueller proud. Stunt driving, appliances through walls, hand job in exchange for beer, skinny dipping, breaking into the high school gym, party crashing, a Hummer through the wall of a house, towel snapping, tearful confessions, a threesome, cow tipping, and many beatings are just some of the wild experiences Denis and Rich have that evening. It is safe to say that they packed more into those 12 hours than in their entire lives - combined.
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