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Book Review: Reluctantly Related by Dr. Deanna Brann

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Reluctantly Related: Secrets To Getting Along With Your Mother-in Law or Daughter-in-Law by Dr. Deanna Brann is an important family resource for resolving differences between in-laws on a whole range of difficult and uncomfortable subjects. The author explains how to bring lasting change to these relationships which tend to be highly contentious at times.

Dr. Brann explains that the in-law relationships are artificial in that they are creatures of the law. In-laws are generally at different stages of life, and this is in great part the reason for contention. In-laws each carry some emotional baggage which only exacerbates bad feelings and ill will. In fact, some mothers-in-law have mixed feelings about their changed role with a son or daughter who was previously close and now is more distant.

Dr. Brann explains the necessity of establishing clearly definable boundaries with parents and in-laws so that expectations are more in line with reality. As such, a mother-in-law must understand her new role so that actions and words reflect true intentions and not unrealistic expectations. In this new relationship, a mother-in-law should treat the new extended family with respect. The important thing is to navigate this new relationship without making too many waves.

The author provides examples which demonstrate how humor can shift the power balance and “break the ice” for all parties involved. The book comes with extensive check lists and scoring keys so that users know how they are doing at various stages while navigating the text.

Reluctantly Related is an important treatise on how to deal with in-laws in a whole variety of contexts and difficult situations. The author provides clear guidance on how to deal with classic personality types. This is not the kind of advice that is written in a book. Instead, the contents typify the experiential domain of human relations.

About Dr Joseph S Maresca

I've taught approx. 34 sections of collegiate courses including computer applications, college algebra, collegiate statistics, law, accounting, finance and economics. The experience includes service as a Board Director on the CPA Journal and Editor of the CPA Candidates Inc. Newsletter. In college, I worked as a statistics lab assistant. Manhattan College awarded a BS in an allied area of operations research. The program included courses in calculus, ordinary differential equations, probability, statistical inference, linear algebra , the more advanced operations research, price analysis and econometrics. Membership in the Delta Mu Delta National Honor Society was granted together with the degree. My experience includes both private account and industry. In addition, I've worked extensively in the Examinations Division of the AICPA from time to time. Recently, I passed the Engineering in Training Exam which consisted of 9 hours of examination in chemistry, physics, calculus, differential equations, linear algebra, probability/ statistics, fluids, electronics, materials science/structure of matter, mechanics, statics, thermodynamics, computer science, dynamics and a host of minor subject areas like engineering economics. A very small percentage of engineers actually take and pass the EIT exam. The number has hovered at circa 5%. Several decades ago, I passed the CPA examination and obtained another license in Computer Information Systems Auditing. A CISA must have knowledge in the areas of data center review, systems applications, the operating system of the computer, disaster recovery, contingency planning, developmental systems, the standards which govern facility reviews and a host of other areas. An MBA in Accounting with an Advanced Professional Certificate in Computer Applications/ Information Systems , an Advanced Professional Certificate in Finance and an Advanced Professional Certificate in Organizational Design were earned at New York University-Graduate School of Business (Stern ). In December of 2005, an earned PhD in Accounting was granted by the Ross College. The program entrance requires a previous Masters Degree for admittance together with a host of other criteria. The REGISTRAR of Ross College contact is: Tel . US 202-318-4454 FAX [records for Dr. Joseph S. Maresca Box 646 Bronxville NY 10708-3602] The clinical experience included the teaching of approximately 34 sections of college accounting, economics, statistics, college algebra, law, thesis project coursework and the professional grading of approx. 50,000 CPA examination essays with the American Institute of Certified Public Accountants. Additionally, membership is held in the Sigma Beta Delta International Honor Society chartered in 1994. Significant writings include over 10 copyrights in the name of the author (Joseph S. Maresca) and a patent in the earthquake sciences.