Women have questions about sex. Christian women in particular are often uncertain when determining what God’s parameters for married love are. It is only right and good to examine each and every aspect of our life with the guidance of the Holy Ghost as we ask God to examine our heart and reveal any areas that may be unpleasing to Him. This task can be daunting when we begin to explore the most intimate areas of our lives. Raised in homes and churches where the subject was largely taboo, or feeling uncomfortable asking questions, many women find determining God’s will for their sex life a lonely, awkward road.
Delving into both the mundane and the sacred, co-authors Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus have stepped up to the call, providing women with a guide to discovering God’s glorious, joy-filled vision for marital sex. The title seems to imply a work filled with dos, don’ts and suggestions; while all these are present Intimate Issues: Twenty-One Questions Christian Women Ask About Sex digs much deeper into underlying thought patterns, forgiveness, sexual healing and much more.
The authors are ever gentle as they encourage women to seek the scriptures for themselves, to repent and get right with God, to seek Him for healing in the places they’ve been so deeply wounded. Their heart is well depicted in the cover art, a cup of coffee that symbolizes a warm conversation between friends as they share openly, honestly and respectfully.
I’ve had the opportunity to read several titles aimed for Christian women on the topic of sex, each seeking to portray the act of love in the positive, life-filled context we find expressed in the word of God. Many of these works provide helpful advice, but never have I read a book that provides such a deep transformation of the mind by drawing upon scripture, prayer and true-life examples. Each chapter is a mini-therapy session in and of itself.
With the section “Change My Heart, O God” additional scripture readings, reflection questions and action points are shared. Chapters exploring sexual pain from the past provide additional spiritual guidance through areas of bondage and limitation. Imagine a beloved and trusted friend praying with you through the pain of past abortions, sexual sin, and memories of abuse; Dillow and Pintus are those friends and their words in print provide much needed loving, grace-filed support. A 12-week Bible study is also included for use singly or in a woman’s small group setting, providing additional journaling, prayer and reading opportunities.
While the book's entire emphasis is upon the spiritual and calling on God to renew our minds and hearts in this area, if you have questions regarding the mechanics of love-making, you’ll find answers here as well. While not a comprehensive manual, the questions most-asked by women regarding the physical aspects of their intimate relationships are related here as well. A wide variety of common concerns are addressed in clinically accurate language without ever descending into the vulgar and crude. As an aside – I love comprehensive indexes, and Intimate Issues provides both an index of scripture references used throughout the text as well as a topical one, should you need a specific answer immediately.
Sisters, do take note of this work. It delves deeper and provides much more than comparable titles. Though written expressly for women (with the exception of the activities which involve your husband), I found myself sharing new understandings with my husband in joy and delight. I’m adding their work for couples (co-written with their husbands) Intimacy Ignited: Conversations Couple to Couple: Fire Up Your Sex Life with the Song of Solomon to my wish-list. If the quality displayed in Intimate Issues follows through in their work for couples, it too will be a powerful tool for the examination and transformation of marriages and an effective agent of spiritual growth.