Friday , March 29 2024
I'd rather watch Nickelback.

Blu-ray Review: Touchback

What? Another sports movie? You bet! And, just like many of the other football flicks that have been produced and set free upon an otherwise unsuspecting populace en masse over the years, Touchback is a pretty tedious, run-of-the-mill affair. In fact, as I sat there, wincing in disgust over the completely television-like performances and story, I suddenly realized the sound of my cat Groucho playing hockey with an empty Popsicle box in the kitchen was infinitely more enjoyable than the dialogue I was hearing coming out of my speakers.

Story-wise, Touchback — another in a long line of Walmart Exclusives — brings us the plight of former high school football star Scott Murphy (Brian Presley, who also produced), whose life and career haven’t turned out as illustrious as he once imagined owing to an injury he suffered twenty years ago. Now, as an adult, Scott is your average family man/farmer/fireman who is about a six-pack of cheap domestic beer away from being white trash (these Walmart Exclusives have to cater to their clientele, you know), and who is in jeopardy of losing his farm to the bank.

And so, Scott does what any man in his situation would do: he decides to off himself. But, instead of dying, he reawakens back in 1991 — right before the big state championship that was to forever change his destiny is set to begin — faced with an opportunity to do it all over again. Yes, it’s not only a sports movie: it’s a fairy tale sports movie! Kurt Russell practically phones it in here as Presley’s coach (why couldn’t they get Robin Williams to co-star as well, thus connecting this film with the much better film, The Best of Times?).

Anchor Bay Entertainment brings us this lackluster feel good drama to Blu-ray in a well-balanced HD transfer that is quite vibrant. Granted, the colors don’t exactly burst off of the screen at you, but the presentation here is a nice one overall. The Dolby TrueHD 5.1 audio track is a pleasant one that balances the film’s dialogue, sound effects, and music perfectly. Special features for this dud include an audio commentary with writer/director Don Handfield and Mr. Presley himself, and a making-of featurette. This Blu-ray/DVD Combo also includes a code to download a digital copy of the film via Vudu.

Because three copies of a Walmart Exclusive will no doubt make up for the fact that it’s not worth watching to begin with. And yet, my cat can find infinite enjoyment with an empty Popsicle box. Hmm.

About Luigi Bastardo

Luigi Bastardo is the alter-ego of a feller who loves an eclectic variety of classic (and sometimes not-so-classic) film and television. He currently lives in Northern California with four cats named Groucho, Harpo, Chico, and Margaret. Seriously.

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