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Author Archives: DuctapeFatwa

Good Germans Don’t Cut and Run

There has been a lot of internet chatter in recent weeks among Americans who style themselves as “leftists,” primarily because they admire Democratic politicians who believe they could do a better job of slaughtering Afghans, Iraqis, and coming soon, Iranians, than the Republicans, and because “we can’t just cut and run.” The crusade is undeniably popular, with politicians and their ... Read More »

Without the Jews, we have no Rapture

(Continued from Part 4) Noushin scrubbed her wet clothes on the flat river stone, glancing occasionally at Sholeh and Sharuz, their wet, plump bodies glistening in the sun. Noushin wasn’t worried about the twins, the water was shallow, the sun was warm, and there was no one about to complain about their nakedness. She was a bit concerned, however, about ... Read More »

“The Citizen Defenders Program, Sir”

(Continued from Part 3) Noushin scrubbed her wet clothes on the flat river stone, glancing occasionally at Sholeh and Sharuz, their wet, plump bodies glistening in the sun. Noushin wasn’t worried about the twins, the water was shallow, the sun was warm, and there was no one about to complain about their nakedness. She was a bit concerned, however, about ... Read More »

God’s wayward Children of Israel

(Continued from Part 2) “Now I won’t be offended if you don’t want to answer, but where do you get them?” Haley grinned at Rick and dipped her roti in the small bowl of thick, creamy raita. “You won’t believe it, but I scavenge them. You know, from houses, when people are Priced Out. They leave most of their stuff, ... Read More »

Defense Secretary William Boykin frowned. “Eleven?”

continued from Part I “The President for Life, um, misspoke, sir,” Chief of Staff Rick Santorum looked uncomfortable. “The Selection applies to offspring of GuestJobbers, sir.. Not Goodjobbers. The media has already been alerted, and the correction is out now. If I may, sir,” and without waiting for an answer touched a switch on Boykin’s desk. The screenbank came to ... Read More »

Haley’s Nose: A GoodJob Day in America, 2009

Haley frowned at the mirror. Her nose was the problem. There was no makeup trick (and Haley knew them all) that could camouflage that nose. No clever earrings, or hat, or artfully designed spectacle frames had any effect. It was impervious to all that, resolutely, steadfastly, even proudly there, right in the middle of her face, jutting out defiantly, bump ... Read More »

The Da Vinci Code Enjoyed and Re-loaded

It’s a great book. Un-put-downable, and written with the big screen in mind, and that screen will be on your mind on every page. It is in effect, the book version of the movie-to-be. Whether you are interested in theology or not, and regardless of your religious bent or lack thereof, you will enjoy the story, and if you do ... Read More »

An American Milestone: MSNBC’s Call to Genocide

On a widely-watched morning news show, the sidekick of the popular morning host called for the murder of all Israelis. A couple of rights groups issued press releases, but other than that, there were no outcries of outrage in the media, on the internet, on the street. The press releases were resoundingly ignored. The view expressed was so compliant with ... Read More »

Maybe Republicrats isn’t such a bad idea

Maybe it’s just me, but I am getting a sense that some Dems are not 100% down with their candidate’s message. Maybe they should be. Magical thinking and Secret Plans someone’s kitten just knows Kerry had to do a 180 on the main issues that will decide the future of your (and his) grandchildren aside, whether people voted for Kerry ... Read More »

With Our Blood And Our Souls We Will Redeem You Yasser Arafat

In a bombed out ruin, the Palestinian people built a shrine, a mausoleum. In a day. Much of the work was done by hand. Ramallah, some of you may recall, has been under quite a brutal occupation for some time. Available technology and raw materials are somewhat limited. Throughout the day, throughout the night, they worked. They did not sleep. ... Read More »