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Audioblog – The Duke in “Phone Crisis!!”

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Hey folks.

What happened for the last week or so is that, following the completion of The Duke’s Fourth EP, being a heart-wrenching catalogue of emotional torment, I kinda went into hibernation for a day or two, in so far as “doing stuff” is concerned. I apologize for the lack of a DVD column this week, but I’ll make up for it on Tuesday, man, you can be sure of that.

Anyway, what this is, is that underneath this text here what serves as an introduction, don’t you know, you’ll find two MP3’s, being Parts One And Two of The Duke in “Phone Crisis”. What you’ll hear therein is, first of all, a very, very nervous Duke preparing to make a very important phone call, a phone call two-years in development, and trying to get my head into some sort of straight-and-narrow state so as I might conduct the resulting conversation with at least 46% less fucks, um’s, ah’s and nervous giggles than would otherwise be the case.

Part Two details the aftermath. What happened, man, you’ll be thinking. Whatever became of said phone call? Both are authentic right-before and right-after deals. It’s like Reality TV, except there’s no visuals, and there’s more swearing.

Seriously, folks, I was beside myself with nerves, and I ain’t a stranger to a cuss at the best of times. Riddled with anxiety, I can barely get a fuck out my mouth without flinging two or three fucks in the middle.

It was maybe an attempt to disassociate myself from the reality of what I was doing. I imagine it may come as a shock, but The Duke is actually a cripplingly shy fella, truth be told. Anyway, hopefully my misery will provide ten minutes or so of entertainment. Oh, and there’s a song at the end of part 2, courtesy of the ever wonderful The Magnetic Fields.

The Duke In Phone Crisis Part One.mp3

The Duke In Phone Crisis Part Two.mp3

Thanks folks.

Hear The Duke’s Recorded Works (Recorded Version)

Fling The Duke An Electronical Email

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About The Duke

  • Dawn

    Listening to that made me think of something that might help: whiskey and nicotine breath combined with a heavy Irish accent is an aphrodisiac to most women.

    At least that’s what Colin Farrell says.

    Don’t feel bad Duke, as my post about broken hearts states, love can also mend them.

  • hey dawn. thank you, and i do respect the strength of character you must hold for to have endured that right there. Regarding Farrel’s statement, i think probably the fact that’s he’s got designer-stubble and cool hair and muscles helps a lot. I do have nicotine breath, though, so…

    And regarding your final statement right there, i think that was maybe what i was trying to do. But it didn’t work, it turns out. Heh. I’m actually a lot more gutted that it sounds. what can you do?

  • RJ

    Tobacco kills.

    It also makes for killer voices.

    Ironic, dontcha think? 🙂

  • shit, man, i hate my voice. i must be smoking me the wrong brand. Time i picked up 20 Bob Dylan’s instead, and a couple packs of Bill Hicks just in case.

  • RJ

    I have a killer voice, but I started out sounding like a little bitch. But…I’ve smoked off and on for years.

    People tell me now that I should be in radio.

    Just call me the Wolfman! 😉

    BTW, your voice isn’t bad at all. And that accent slays American chicks.

    My advice: Move to the US. Bang scads of mindless 20-year olds. Then move back… 😉

  • My advice: Move to the US. Bang scads of mindless 20-year olds. Then move back… 😉

    Ha, who knows, man, maybe one day. I tend to be of a horribly romantic disposition though. Mind you, there’s a lot to be said for banging scads and so on.

    Shit, man, all this hilarity has managed to do what was intended; ie, remove The Duke from the crippling reality of it all. Right about now i feel terribly deflated. Seeing someone. What the fuck man. In all the time i spent constructing conversations in my head and asking every possible question and answering with every imaginable answer, i never gave much thought to the old “she might be, y’know, with someone else” thing. But she’s beautiful, man, course shes gonna be. Fuckin hell. Still, i write better songs about fuck off fuck this fucking fuck when i’m miserable…

  • “It does mean I can carry on feeling miserable, which is good”

    I think that sums up this situation, life in general and the entire plight of being Irish.


  • Ayu

    On “Edinburgh” you sound like Alex Band of The Calling.

  • Dave, i agree. i think the irish function better when miserable, anyhow. Although technically i’m british, on account of the Northern and so on. but miserable by proxy.

    And Ayu, i haven’t heard much of the calling, except for the cover the did of London Calling, but i’m gonna go ahead and take that as a compliment anyhow. 🙂