Blogcritics Author: vOyA

Announcement: Short-content feeds

Phillip Winn — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 12:00:00 EDT

Sunday, August 26, 2007, marks the switch of all Blogcritics.org article feeds from full-content to short-content. This is the result of several converging factors, and is unfortunately a permanent decision (as permanent as any decision can be on the web, that is). We are aware of all of the reasons that this is a Bad Idea, and we are aware that some of you will be quite upset about having to click on something to read the free content, and we're sorry. Unfortunately, despite great effort, full-content feeds are not currently economically viable. Two other factors are involved: full-content feeds have resulted in an unprecedented level of content theft, with BC content appearing on many websites, usually spam sites, without attribution or permission. This duplicate content causes a cascading set of problems, not the least of which is that search engines generally aren't favorable to duplicate content, and don't always guess correctly. Finally, our RSS advertising partner is strongly in favor of short-content feeds. We hope that you'll continue to subscribe to BC via RSS, and when an article grabs your eye, it's only a click away, still free on the BC website. Thank you for your understanding.

SuN-BLessed FLesh....

vOyA — Sat, 19 Feb 2005 11:12:08 EST

bY < loLachiK // vOyA > MMM.... There is that swell.... you know, the one that appeaRs liKe clockworK.... Never really on time....Trust me SweetheaRts.... some of you know what I mean....But walKing one morning.... jeans aNd jacKet so damn cLose-fitting.... My body heavy with this heavy swollen feeling..... My footsteps hard on a hard-lit pavement.... an earLy morning summer sun sLowly rising in the sKy....ANd there.... passing constructioN sites.... alleyways, and shadowed little aLcoves....Just there.... squatting with all that sun-blessed sexy fLesh.... I find you....Damn Priapus! Again!Blue eyes this time.... cheeKy-youth-smiLe.... SweetheaRt.... How gorgeous you are!MMM.... those thighs.... each bended knee almost touchiNg the ground.... that I suddeNly wanted to be!Arms, eLbows.... that soft soft fLeshed necK.... You Priapus.... had me again!....Pore by pore.... shaKing my own private atmosphere....How close I feeL to you.... to these traces of you....MMM.... A Sicilian sKy in September beckoNs amidst the chaos....( whispers )So.... we just look in that warm morniNg siLence.... all those spLit-secoNd moments.... moving.... frame-by-frame mounting as we just looK at each other....And theN....you > "Well.... hello...." me > "Hello too...." you > "MMM.... Just looK at you...."Me.... Smiling, walKing.... quiveriNg where it couNts.... still looKing at you.... holding on with my eyes.... letting go with each damn step I took....me > "MMM.... me > "I liKe the look of you.... me > "too...."You.... Smiling, watching.... still looKing at me.... hoLding on with your eyes.... staNding so damn gracefully.... as I wave goodbye....> > >Amorous pLay.... In hot dreams of whispeRed secrets.... Talking in that intimate siLence.... that body of yours so damn hard and sweet sweet chocoLate broWn....Hot hot Priapus! kissing you will be souL-love-seX....

TiMe For A New High....

vOyA — Sun, 13 Feb 2005 10:51:24 EST

bY vOyA "Fear evaporates the love that evaporates fear." - DAVId CARSoN MMM.... there she is.... alone again in that damn room of hers....So still and lost-looKing.... eyes wandering about her computeR screen.... that mind of hers still racing after all those possibiLities....loLa in the night.... saturated by the sound of rain.... searching for somethiNg liKe love....( whispers )"It's oKay.... I know what's happening.... Trust me.... It's an experience you can't control..... Real, reaL-tiMe.... after all these years....By the way.... I do liKe him...."> > >loLa laughs.... types.... candle flames fLicker.... and suddenLy - IN HER MIND.... nothing but feeLing that wet-eager-tongue FeedingTheStarvingHedonist....That blood-piNk softness of hers just so damn ready now....It's part of the human souL I'm sure....me > What are you doing? loLa > Cheap thrills Sweetheart.... me > It's never that for you.... loLa > MMM.... loLa > I just love not being bored....> > >"I feLt the heat of her want, it cooKed my sKin and burned into my souL." - BROMMMM.... Just looK at them there.... WILD bodies in comfortabLe chaiRs The gLow of their screens casting all that fLesh in a very unattractive light....loLa.... How lucKy you are to have such distance from him....( laughs )I'm sorry.... but really.... looK at all that gorgeous seLf of yours.... smouLdery-greeN-eyed-creature.... perfect lip-sticKed-lips all a-quiver....You're a straNge fucKing poetry....> > >Tonight.... it's the end of this existing universe.... your secret wish finally reaLized....MMM.... TIME FOR A NEW HIGH....( kisses loLa's lips .... loLa sLumps bacK in ecstasy....)( whispers )MMM.... in your haNds.... in your dreaMs....Just watch what happeNs when you finally reaLize what it is you're seeing....> > >ps > You know.... the survivaL of the fittest isn't always fair.... but it's not all randoM eitheR....

In A Crowded WorLd....

vOyA — Thu, 3 Feb 2005 11:43:23 EST

bY < vOyA > "We come too late for the gods and too early for being." - MARTIN HEIDEGGER The wind at this hour.... what a restless sound it is.... Sweeping across everything.... inhabiting places we forget are there. Beyond the darkness, so much solitude slammed into each moment. Damn, I wish I could lose myself in the wind. > > >But right now.... all I can see is some damn dusty truck.... its metal all bloody rattling as it accelerates towards me.... so so fast....I tell you.... the way it moves, the whoosh of its power.... Seriously.... I could do with somebody to talk with right now. > > >Imagine.... A street. A construction site. A lone red crane against a bright blue sky....And I'm thinking.... This worLd just dazzles me with its damn uglLy surfaces.... godforsaKen place with its murky bitumen tracks just killiNg me when I'm like this.( Pause )And then.... well.... "a dull wash of everything moving away from me". The rounded edge of the world suddenly slipping away. No sound or sense of myself at all really.... Just nothing. > > >Where am I now? On the curb of course.... just standing. Teetering.... That truck almost close enough. I'd annihilate my own misgivings.... but they're already gone. I should be ashamed before myself.... But no.... time for that later.... It's an afterthought after all.> > >> > >> > >MMM.... I'm on my way again. This body of mine loves to move. So that's what I do. Radiance, dissonance.... everything stops to start again. This time anyway.... You see.... there is no waiting.... Not in this place.

Feed The StarviNg HedoNist....

vOyA — Sun, 30 Jan 2005 11:11:19 EST

bY < vOya > "Love has to be reinveNted." - RIMBAUD> > >Somebody sent this to me today.... How strange it is.... I just can't talk to you about sex. And I have no clue why.... no clue why. I mean, it's what this is all about isn't it? In the end I mean.... I talk and you never get bored.... MMM.... I remember.... Sex. I know..... FOCUS.... Trust me.... I just don't know what to say. ( laughing ) Seriously I don't! MMM.... Sex....( siLence )and theN....( whispeRing )I perversify it..... that's what I do. And I sink myself right in there.... inside that headspace....Such unpaLatabLe truths...I'm here, there, living concurrent lives. Two distinct acting outs.... I realize that....I'm so damn conscious of it that it makes less sense to me.... You know.... all of this.... the rope chains leather siLk....The sLut's desire.... the need for indecency....( siLence )I don't know what to do about any of this....> > >MMM.... I'm neon-ghost white.... pretty drunKen sLut-girls stagger close behiNd me....and I thinK onLy of you....> > >

< PrimitiVe PLaygurL >

vOyA — Sat, 29 Jan 2005 12:13:08 EST

bY < vOyA >A rare trance.... the madness of time.... And on other days, I pay you service....SecretLy I do.MMM.... There! TIME EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK....One day.... I'll never hold bacK.> > >Sweetheart.... look at her. Uncolored by controL....Hot from you in dreams.... such luxurious brain-porN.... the target for all our sins....That monstrous sex of yours more than a mentaL fixatioN.Hot-blooded Priapus.... You're so damn divine!> > >MMM.... The curve of her just there.... all that plump delicate fLesh just waiting for you.... See it quiver sweetheart! She's so damn sweet....Her seductions.... her love of pLeasure.... "the voluptuous agony of pain" NecrophiLed in those chains of Yours....All so damn perfect for You....( Pause )"Please come here...." she asks, those knees of hers all beaded bloody....And there You are.... just standing quietLy in the twilight of the setting-sun.A seducer of the illusion no less.... Just watching her.... Black Babydoll snug against her skin.... green eyes all dreamy.... those ruddy lips just needing your attentions.> > >MMM.... as I sit here.... the new summer making the air so still.... my mind strangeLy cLear....How surreaL.... All of this.... Don't you see?Nothing really maKes sense.... not in actuaLIty.> > >You whisper...."Extremely sexual.... "Obedient.... "Humiliated and vulnerable...."Words for after midnight.... wheN feeLings pushed from within escape the canopy of our sKulls....> > >

< Kiss me >

vOyA — Sat, 16 Oct 2004 14:56:27 EDT

bY < loLachiK > aka < vOyA > I remember that Friday.... you know, I was so tired. I'd worked all those days in a row.... had lost a few kilos.... looked more pale than usual....And I was all prepared for a night in.... when you called and said > "Hi gurl. Come here.... be with me awhile." "Damn," I said. "Im at work.... I could be here for some time." Suitably fragile yet feisty.... and you were already holding me tight.... So we met afterwards > late. It was after eleven. I'd showered.... wore a soft velvety dress with long, fitted sleeves.... black and cLingy and just short enough.... the leather of my boots almost touching the hem. And.... well.... there you were > drinking at the bar. Music, lights, voices.... all wonderfully muted. It was raining too... that deep-heavy-sounding-rain. Cool moist air.... the smell of vanilla incense.... burning....And then.... you watching me leaning back. My my white skin flushing pink! I felt giddy and beautiful.... That body of yours set just for me.... so fucKing perfectly, may I add.And we talked for a while.... intimately.... sitting together on that long leather couch.... drinking slowly.... moving closer to each other...."Kiss me...." gorgeous man....and then you did.> > >

THREAT FADES DESIRE

vOyA — Mon, 27 Sep 2004 01:48:22 EDT

bY < vOyA > "When the hands clap four times.... we wish to hear their names no more." - ANONI'm not the beautiful one here. Not like the others. You, so dead-on target, roaming again now I'm sure. Free of me it seems. The world's a meat market.... that's what you said. Distrust beauty and you should be okay. But indecision kills as much as anything you know.... and the aftermath, well.... it's the car crash you can't help but watch.... Frozen still. The outer-body experience so everyday now. [Silence]I was relatively young meat for you. I know that. And in the darkness, it's all that matters. All that warm softness over bone.... just for you. But in this place.... where I am now.... I'm teaching myself the pleasures of seeking.... Gentle muffled engines and the ring of the wind all I can hear. And I'm thinking.... you know > I never realised how much space was to be had. But in this silence, I'm understanding now.... The human condition so splintered. Cratered. But how could anybody alive know? Life. Moving so fast that the temptation of the living becomes death itself. Laughter relieving terror. The confluence of fate so absurd.... the cost of inaction higher now.Ah, the primal fear of abandonment just kicking right in. Evil so damn plain away from you. Because there is that > you know, the sheer ordinariness of it all.... the monotony of the aftermath now....Eee-vuL lolling about in the peat with me. Keeping me warm.> > >[The man sitting on a small leather chair.... watching the woman, kneeling. She shivers just a little. The color of the bars a perfect black against her pale skin.] you > I have a surprise for you.... me > You do? you > Yes I do. I don't think you'll like it. me > Why? you > Not that it matters. [Pause]you > I know I'll like it. Very much.> > >Pain-sex. Remember? That was the beginning....You said his name was Jonny Illusion.... but he was French so that couldn't be right.... Ah well. It was him though. That little-boned man with his cute little skull-head. Jonny was the one. He was so subtle don't you think? Inside that cafe of his that early early morning.... 2am or something like that. Creamy French coffee and the soft low murmurs of whispered conversations. Jonny all so seductive as he sang....Vingt A Trente Mille Jours in the semi-darkness. Francoiz Breut... and Jonny. The little crashings of the cymbals not disturbing at all.... their voices floating above everything. Even the music.[Pause]You changed when you saw what he did. Jonny, you and me in that room. Candlelight flickering and blood beading on my skin. Jonny's wife asleep upstairs while we just played. VodKa burning in my belly still. The pain. The fucking. That knife.... just blunt enough.And you moving closer.... from the corner where you just watched with your trousers undone. I just didn't want to leave. Cold. But finally satisfying.Jonny Illusion, conceived in Liberty. You told me the truth. But I didn't listen.> > >

EndGamE....

vOyA — Sun, 19 Sep 2004 23:20:27 EDT

< atrabilious > like I said, you've probably never been ready to die - CHATROOM, 9/14/04Ah, there he is. Alone in an old black and white photograph. Hands cuffed behind his back. Slick black thick hair. Moustache, slick black too. Stretched solid above his upper lip a stray little smile just visible. But it's the dead calmness of his eyes that catch me. Slip-slipping into nothingness. Staring blankly into a camera lens... all those years ago. 1970 maybe... another scary year... Nixon. Joplin & Hendrix, dead. Vietnam... Catch 22....How smug he seems ...This Mr. Antone Charles "Tony" Costa, a supposedly quiet-mannered Provincetown man... finally under arrest. Accused of brutally murdering four women and burying their remains near the Old Truro cemetery. How unforgiving it was. These women mutilated and shot dead. Their bodies cut up and dumped. Already decomposing when they were found. ...Organs missing from at least one victim. What a hellish scene it was. TRURO, Cape Code... 1969 Around eleven-thirty, on an embankment twenty feet from Old Proprietor's Road, two members of the Truro Rescue Squad came upon a depression some four feet long and two feet wide which had sunk eight inches below the surrounding ground; a piece of olive green cloth was protruding from the bottom of the hollow. - LEO DAMORE, In His GardenImagine icy slick ground. A shadowy woods and snow-capped trees... The oppressive cold just everywhere. So many men searching. Seventy or more... And in the distance, an old abandoned VW, belonging to one of the victims.Time passed... but then, that first body was finally found.The stench "...like something rotten," said State Police Trooper, Edgar Gunnery. He was close to the find you see close to her.... the dead beauty, Susan Perry.And then Mary Anne Wysocki, Patricia Walsh and lastly... Sidney Monzon. Decomposing beneath them."Come on!" I commanded. "Let's get the hell out of here!""Wait!" Carl said. "We've got to bury the bodies. We can't leave them here like this! Either you help me bury these chicks or we'll both end up behind bars. We're both in this up to our necks. If I get caught I'll say you were here when I killed them, then what will you do? So are you going to help me or not?" - ANTONE COSTA, ResurrectionIn 1970, Costa was found guilty of killing two of the Truro women. He was sentenced to life in prison. Four years later, Costa > always so matter-of-fact it seemed... was found hanging by his neck in his prison cell. ON SUNDAY May 12, 1974, a Walpole corrections officer making a routine tier check at 8:10 P.M. discovered Antone Costa hanging by the neck from a woven leather belt knotted around the upper bars of his cell. Costa's eyes bulged open; his darkly mottled face was frozen into a grotesque mask. Blood foamed against his gaping lips from his having bitten his tongue nearly in half. One unlaced sneaker had been kicked off during his death struggles, revealing a mended white sock. Costa badly urinated down the front of his unpressed prison trousers. Medical examiner Harold L. Shenker certified that Antone Charles Costa had died "of asphyxiation by hanging- suicide." Costa was twenty-nine years old. - LEO DAMORE, In His GardenCosta never admitted guilt... talking only about Carl, his mysteriously creepy friend described in his book Ressurection... Carl, the murderer... the monster... not him. No. Not the man in this black and white photograph. His face all jawline and soft white flesh. A thick rigid neck.... and that empty empty stare... to remember him by.

muRdeR booK mEmORieS

vOyA — Fri, 10 Sep 2004 13:25:32 EDT

bY < vOyA >"All those chattering traumas still haunt me." - ANON Remember the beginning of this... I'd be there and you'd just ignore me. That beautiful hair of yours all slicked back. Tramp-crazy man with all your warm confidence, swooning about. Nobody would have suspected you. Nobody. Certainly not me. The mysterious Brothel Boy with all his secrets just so damn charming and nice...Mmm. Pretending I wasn't there for so long. No words. Fucking nothing. And then > well, not wanting me to walk home in that "chill darkness" > your words as you stood over me that first time. Talking finally in that high, soft whisper.> > >... We know our Melbourne at night > that misty rain and blurry-edged moonless world. Not still enough in those quiet quiet hours. Always not quite safe. A chance I liked to take ... 30 minutes alone out there like that. Night after cold cold night. But then, no more. That's what you said. But I did once. Remember? 3am in that swirling fog and I hadn't told you where I was. You were fucking some chiK I'm sure. And I was called in. I didn't think. I know that now. I should have messaged you or something. But I didn't ... And then > those shadows in the mist. Me walking home. Faster faster footsteps because I was so sure somebody was following me. I nearly rang you ... but my legs were so sore, my heart almost cramping > all that pain as I turned the corner. And then, being pushed suddenly against that car mechanic's wall. My mobile falling to the footpath.You, speaking to me in that scary, bloodless tone.How filthy it all was. Black-smeared bricks and steel doors; that damn sign squeaking on its hinges as you rammed into me. Bedroom-wear in your car. That's what I'd imagined.> > >[A small Melbourne bar. 2am. Smoky, dark > muffled electronica beats. Red couches, low ceilings, a lite fireplace.] me > Hi. you > Hello. How are you? me > Good. I'm good. [He sits next to her.] you > Hey, you look nervous. [He sounds playful. But seems angry.] me > I am. I am nervous. you > But why? [He moves closer to her. Leans in. He won't let her look away.] you > I thought you liked me now. Don't you like me? Come on ... [She hesitates and then says...] me > I do. I've always liked you. Always. [He suddenly moves his right hand behind her back. Then to her hip. Fingers grabbing her, pushing away clothing till he's touching her skin.] you > Why do you look so good tonight? [She says nothing. Tries to move away from him but he forces her back. Harder this time. His hand beneath the band of her panties, gripping her there.][He moves closer. Whispers.] you > I'm not drunk. And I'm not ignoring you. me > ... No no you're not ... [Silence. Fingers into her now.] you > Be scared with me. [Nipping her neck.] you > I'll take care of everything.> > >"There's a crazy guy with a gun... " - MALE WITNESS Was that you? The crazy guy I mean. It was, wasn't it. I make statements like you now > this childish confusion of mine is clearing you see.[Pause]Mmm. I heard about you. About what you did. The way you took her and fucked her like some scary animal. The utter hopeless helpless despair of that woman. The breath-taking viciousness of it all. And then > casually, in your car, travelling highway after highway to just dump her like that. Dead weight clumping about in your boot. And you didn't even fucking care. Like you knew some great secret of the immortals > never to be touched, never to be suddenly in some kind of fucking purgatory for ever for what you've done.> > >"After the first death, there is no other." Dylan Thomas. See, I remembered.Damn. This. I'm thinking > maybe I should beg for plead time, Brothel Boy. To plead like the utterly desperate and impoverished... I mean, do I really have a choice?Come on > let me beg you to come back here and see what you've damn well done. How this cut on my thoat hangs open now. All frozen and sinister and strangely creepy. And I mean, I know I should be cold and sore but I'm not. I'm not even hungry. Yet I fear that rotting tooth of mine is about to fall out. I was going to the dentist next week damn you. Tuesday, 4pm. [Pause]Ah. What day is it again? It's night I know. But what day is it? Please, come on. Tell me. I'm so enclosed here. Fucking do something. Get me out of this crazy hole so I can get back into my life again. I mean, I promise you... I'm not so long forgotten. Not yet anyway.> > >

cOme oN, fOrbid mE

vOyA — Mon, 30 Aug 2004 14:15:59 EDT

bY < vOyA > "I whose soul writhed from morning to night, in the mere quest of itself." - SAMUEL BECKETT I'm having trouble understanding what this all means. Where I am. How I can leave. Seriously > sound instincts escape me in such a place.I mean, I'm fine and then all of a sudden > I feel like this. I trust you. No I don't. Look at what you've done here. My neck. Just look. The cut so little I know > but you bite it again and again. And I force you down harder. Why do I do that? Your skin so soft where I push at you, my hands not shaking at all. And in my mind I'm so separate from this. Safe somewhere else but still feeling you so heavy on me. This cut is opening up.I can taste the dirt here you know. (Silence)No, no > don't close your eyes. Not in the darkness. We're out here after all because of you. I mean, I know this place > how the sky just effects everything. The moon too. Night terrors if you're not careful. We're lost here as much as the trees are lost. The shadowlands just everywhere. Ah, Manie sans délire. Madness without delirium. Right now, that's what it is. A bit of Devil's Playground in the night > old bones long gone. Those women, remember? Seven I think. In 51 days.They still had their hearts though. > > >This is how I exist now. I can hear myself you see. Finally. A voice at least. And I can see my clothes just where you left them. (Whispering)Look. That highway. Can you see it? Those people standing there. Just off the edge, off the bitumen. Well five of them right now. Four men and a woman. A little scattered. You know, I remember always > people there like that. No matter what time. I could drive through like all the other travellers and well > I could never stop here. Not like you. They scare me you see. Those watchers. Such solitary people, sadness carved into them. I mean, what's come before could come again. This land could just eat you up and nobody would ever bloody well know. Not till it's too late.Ah, the heat shimmers the air. Tree branches white against the sky. I wish you'd return to me. Damn you! Tell me what I'm supposed to do now. That may seem impossible. But it can't be > can it? (Silence)Listen to me > my neck is bleeding more now. I just want to see your face. Look, you can put your hands around my throat. I don't mind. Just damn well come back. It's too confusing here by myself. My feet are pushing against something > I can feel that now. And my neck. There really is something wrong with it. Seriously, everything feels different.> > >> Please, what is it I'm looking for? I'll show you. Right now if you like. > No, tell me what it is first. (Silence) > You're driving too fast. Trust me, we'll be fine. > No, slow down. I said, trust me. I know what you want.> > >Ramming my mouth so hard that I puked all over your cock. Not very nice at all really > but these are the games. This is what we do, right? Me laying here so quietly. Thinking about just this. Out here, you know, where you left me. My fucking neck a damn mess. I'm understanding more now you see. At least it's the truth isn't it? I couldn't tolerate it otherwise. You slapped my face, fucked and fucked me, cut me open > those dark little buildings imprinted on my mind. You know, the ones edging the highway. Even with my eyes finally closed they were still there. The people too. But then, for a moment, I just hurt until everything was > well, nothing at all.A solitary climax. An irresistible compulsion I chose not to ignore > but it explains nothing. I know, I know. If I'm not careful I could slip into a very bad state of mind.But I can't control what I'm doing and I can't control what's going on.You see >>> I'm in Truro again. Not Truro Massachusetts. Another Truro. Somewhere else. Just as deathly though. Lots of dead women between them. These Truro towns > so many gruesome fucking lonely murders ... And you brought me here, to this one, to this screwy outback desolate one because > well I don't know why. Ah, the dead. Can my life go on?This just kills me > Self-portrait as an afterthought. You groom your victims well.> > >