REVIEW

TV Recap: Project Runway - Season Five, Episode Seven

Written by Brandy
Published September 02, 2008

Last time on Bravo TV’s Project Runway, our designers catered to some larger than life ladies. Joe’s client ate up his glittery pink pantsuit, and he won the challenge. Daniel’s lady looked sad in a lemony sorbet chiffon, and he went home. This week’s episode begins with a heapin’ helpin’ of Kenley Collins BS. Kenley “Giggle at Daniel in Front of the Judges” Collins claims to miss him.

As the remaining designers ready themselves for a new day at Parsons, Keith vlogs that he “wants to change the way the world dresses.” Lined up in rows of stackable chairs, the designers watch as Heidi Klum-Seal strides onto the runway in a ruffled umpire dress. Well, it’s got huge black and white vertical stripes and a ruffled collar. This is what a person wears who’s deciding someone’s fashion future?

At any rate, out come the winning and losing designers’ models. Since the last two challenges did not use the professional models, the models paired with the last two losing designers are put up on eBay. No, they are actually put up on the runway to be chosen or sent home by the most recent challenge winner. In this case that challenge winner is Joe, with his wide-eyed, frozen smile. What is that a symptom of, in the DSM IV? Anyone? On freeze frame he looks like he’s auditioning for the next Wes Craven film.

Heidi offers up the three winning/losing designers’ models for a human sacrifice, er, no, I mean for Joe to choose from. Joe chooses his past model, Carpaccio? (Well that’s what it sounds like.) This means the other two models are out, and Heidi sends them home. It might be my imagination (that wouldn’t be unusual), but they seem relieved. If I were putting a comic book thought bubble over their heads, it would read, “Yay! Joe won’t eat us!”

That bit of business over for this week, Heidi informs the designers they are all to go to the rooftop of 142 W. 31st street. She won’t tell them any more than that. The designers, to a person, look decidedly chagrined. Heidi is smiling like the Cheshire Cat. The group walks down the New York sidewalks toward the destination. They could just as easily be marching to the guillotine by the looks on their faces. Maybe they will be designing for Louis XVI. Well, Blayne did interview that he thought this was about meeting some mysterious superstar. Designing for a deposed headless monarch. Oh, wacky Bravo execs. Whatever will you think of next?

The designers enter a nondescript parking garage, and now Kenley Collins is whining, “I’m scaaared.” Someone else says this looks like a haunted house. The group makes its way onto the roof of this crumbling building, and... surprise! On the roof level of a parking garage, they find - cars! Oprah! You did it again. No, but the designers don’t get to keep the cars. Tim introduces Saturn designer Chris Webb, who explains that the designers must each design an outfit from recycled car parts. Okay, someone at the network has been jogging along the roadside too long. They must have passed the road sign: Caution. Fug Ahead.

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TV Recap: Project Runway - Season Five, Episode Seven
Published: September 02, 2008
Type: Review
Section: Video
Filed Under: Video: TV Recap, Video: Reality TV, Culture: Fashion and Beauty, Video: Television
Part of a feature: Stitching Together Project Runway
Writer: Brandy
Brandy's BC Writer page
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