Everyone knew Bennett's MO: Put on a back-slappin', hoe-downin' face, pander to Seattle's elitism (or at least its renowned 'nice-guy' attitude), and, as soon as the Emerald City's guard is down, sneak away with the only team that has ever brought Seattle a world championship. It's not as if Bennett's ulterior motives were hard to see — after Katrina turned N'Awlins into the murder capital, where they murder for capitol (thanks Jay-Z), OKC welcomed the Hornets with burly, DDT-laced arms. But Starbucks head honcho Howard Schulz was apparently too blinded by the piles of money littering his front lawn to realize that when he sold the team to Bennett, both he and his city were being fleeced.

As Bennett and his cabal of not-so-savvy Machiavellians — as super-snake Aubrey McClendon let slip last year, "We didn't buy the team to keep it in Seattle, we hoped to come [to OKC]" — crossed hurdle after trouble-free hurdle, Seattleites were apparently too caught up in the reintroduction of the Pike Place Roast to care.

Perhaps they were resting on their laurels, waiting for their knight in shining armor, Microsoft dude Steve Ballmer, to ride in on a wave of Vistas to save the day, but the balding billionaire had his own business to attend to (replacing a certain spectacled genius). As NBA owners, OKC councilmen, and even His Surreptitiousness David Stern waved the green flag toward the Sooner State, the gray dawn slowly rose on the Space Needlers.

Seattle mayor Greg Nickels, who looks peculiarly like the famous swindler Jabba the Hutt, vowed to not let the team go without a fight. Formalities, pleasantries, and suit-and-ties descended on the courtroom last month as Seattle hoped to force the Sonics into honoring the remaining two years on the KeyArena lease. City attorney Tom Carr came out in the final week with a grin splattered across his face, saying he firmly believed the 41-year-old franchise would remain until 2010 (and thus stand as a bigger lame duck than Dubya).

But everyone has a price, and for Nickels the Hutt, eight figures was all it took. $45 million up front, with another $30 if the NBA doesn't award Seattle a team in five years (granted, the Seattle legislators have to approve $300-$500 in KeyArena renovations in the next 17 months...you do the math). Comparisons to the Baltimore Colts, the Brooklyn Dodgers and the Cleveland Browns Version 1.0 abounded, with shoulders extended for the entire city to rest its head on. Seattle may get another team, or it may not — only time, or linking Bennett to al-Qaeda, will tell.

The day may come when the Blazers, owned by Seattle magnate Paul Allen, relocate 175 miles north, taking the spot vacated by the OKC Liars/Cheaters/Benedict Arnolds. And if that day comes, I don't want a single tear shed for my fellow fans.

That doesn't make me jaded, does it?