SATIRE

Domesticating Torture Creates New Jobs

Written by Jordan Richardson
Published June 05, 2008

With the United States reopening the case of Maher Arar to determine if he was sent to Syria to be tortured, it got me thinking.

Outsourcing torture has long been an issue with American governments. Outsourcing has taken place both in the form of outsourcing the actual individuals doing the torturing, meaning using an Egyptian or an Afghani or a Syrian to do the torturing, or in the form of outsourcing the location used for the torturing, such as Guantanamo Bay or Abu Ghraib or Hong Kong.

The presidents of the United States have long stuck by the same message: “We do not torture.” Reagan said it with his message to the Senate in 1988. Clinton ratified the UN Convention to Congress in 1994 and used similar language to Reagan, using four diplomatic reservations focused on one word: “mental.”

Yes, most American presidents and governments have continued to uphold this stance with clarity and without contention or quibbling.

President Bush has repeated it consistently throughout his tenure, often whispering under his breath the slight addition: “But we know someone who does.”

Of course, Bush knows as we all know that America is at war and must do whatever it takes to protect its citizens. That means getting the terrorists and possible terrorists and possible potential terrorists and their families and friends and physicians and mail carriers and bartenders and barbers and neighbours and teachers and priests and foot massagers as far away from American soil as humanly possible.

I think this is a mistake.

With the economy looking to be in less than ideal shape, outsourcing should be the last thing on American minds at this point and time. By pushing torture outside of America in an effort to duck regulations, American officials are making a serious mistake in protecting what could be a burgeoning job market.

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Jordan Richardson likes to review movies as the Canadian Cinephile here and enjoys reviewing music of all genres as the Canadian Audiophile here.
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Domesticating Torture Creates New Jobs
Published: June 05, 2008
Type: Satire
Section: Politics
Filed Under: Politics: Law and Rights, Politics: U.S., Politics: War and Terrorism
Writer: Jordan Richardson
Jordan Richardson's BC Writer page
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Comments

#1 — June 6, 2008 @ 16:58PM — bliffle

Torture doesn't work. You never get any useful information. Just ask our own guys who have been tortured. Ask John McCain: did torture make you reveal USA secret plans? No. Soldiers are usually pretty resolute.

Our best interrogator of Viet Cong prisoners during the Vietnam war stated this unequivocally: torture doesn't work. The only thing that works is empathy.

All you accomplish with torture is to employ torturers.

It also turns decent peopple into torturers. It's the competitive effect. You have to become a 'good' torturer to advance and get promotions. The boss himself is a torturer and judges you. Lacking any real accomplishments what matters is your adherence to the torturers orthodoxy and your enthusiasm for supporting torture. Mob psychology.

Torture doesn't work, and it leads to corruption and ineffectiveness of the society.

Those who support torture are traitors to their society: they accomplish nothing and discredit their politics.

#2 — June 7, 2008 @ 12:00PM — Joanne Huspek [URL]

There are several empty warehouses in Detroit you could use. Say, could you shoot a quick email to Governor Jen about the possibility? Or maybe drop a line to Jeff Daniels and the Michigan Economic Development Corporation?

#3 — June 7, 2008 @ 12:22PM — Jordan Richardson [URL]

Waste not, want not. I'm on it.

#4 — June 8, 2008 @ 06:24AM — Ruvy

One hopes this is a satire: when unemployment gets bad enough, even breaking someone else's knees for information is a job that can put food on the table.

#5 — June 8, 2008 @ 10:07AM — Cindy D

What happened to Ruvy's post? I see it in "fresh comments" but not here.

#6 — June 8, 2008 @ 10:22AM — Ruvy

My comment is there, Cindy. There just ain't a whole lot of comment. It's right above yours

#7 — June 8, 2008 @ 10:56AM — Cindy D

me<---blinks

I swear it wasn't there all morning. I was looking at that since 7:30 a.m.

Oh well, you know what they say about eye witness testimony.

#8 — June 8, 2008 @ 11:43AM — Christopher Rose [URL]

No, Ruvy's post definitely wasn't there earlier. I've asked our tech supremo to look into it...

#9 — June 8, 2008 @ 12:16PM — Jordan Richardson [URL]

Well Ruvy, it does say it's a satire, but these days you can never be too sure.

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