The following transcript is from the May 16, 2008 edition of the BC Sports Treehouse Fort.

Spygate continued to rumble through the NFL offseason this week, with calls for Congressional intervention and independent investigations, newspaper apologies and beat writer explanations, Kraft blame for the Super Bowl loss on Spygate, and indecent Boston fan exposure. In related news, true magnetic north has been officially moved to the WEEI studios in downtown Boston.

Venus Williams lost in the Italian Open Friday 5-7, 6-2, 6-3 while Serena Williams withdrew from the same tournament with back troubles. Apparently, contrary to musical belief, there are often such devoted sisters.

Two giants of women's sports announced retirements within 24 hours' time of each other this week as Annika Sorenstam and Justine Henin both planned for lives outside their sports. Rumors of performance enhancing drugs seemed rather ludicrous for both women until Henin congratulated Sorenstam on her retirement by waving from the Empire State Building. Excuse me... waving the Empire State Building.

The Pistons broke from the trend in this season's NBA playoffs by finishing the Magic in five games and actually winning a road game. We'd take a cheap shot at the Orlando Magic here, but Robert Horry will get to them eventually.

The San Antonio Spurs and New Orleans Hornets have agreed to play Game 7 in Sacramento, CA, neutral ground for both teams. Emergency rations are being flown in from around the nation to help fans of both teams at Arco Arena survive an expected 604 overtimes.

Peter Magowan is leaving as managing partner of the San Francisco Giants. His retirement gift will be four packages of day-old ballpark sushi, a Build-a-Bear with Barry Bonds' uniform, and Ray Durham.

Recent St. Louis Cardinals closer Jason Isringhausen went on the disabled list today after punching a television in manager Tony La Russa's office. Isringhausen is reportedly concerned about retaining his place on the team upon his return after receiving a "Get Well Eventually" card from La Russa.

Interleague games begin tonight with the big rivalries, including Yankees-Mets, LA, LA-ish, Houston-Dallas, and Cubs-Pirates. As always, the Pirates fall into a league of their own, though this one obviously must allow for crying.

And finally, Alex Rodriguez has pre-recorded a congratulatory message for Manny Ramirez when he reaches 500 home runs. In return, Yankees fans have recorded a message for Alex Rodriguez when he reaches the park tonight. We at the Treehouse Fort have secured the message and will play it for you now: [sound of man swearing for 15 seconds]