Ever since Oates resigned in 2001 and Pudge departed for the World Series-bound Marlins in 2003, the Rangers have been caught in this monotonous, forgettable cycle that generally haunts the Baltimore Orioles or the Cincinnati Reds — they are just good enough to pound the suffering, but are never rewarded with a draft-pick high enough to reverse their fortunes. Plus, when they finally strike gold, like they did with do-it-all shortstop Michael Young, they spoil his talents by surrounding him with broken-down pitchers and Milton Bradley, best known for tearing his ACL during the climax of an anti-umpire tirade. You know it's bad when AARP-eligible Nolan Ryan is the best pitcher in the ballpark.

Perhaps Texas' 2008 slogan sums it up: "You Could Use Some Baseball." I'm not sure if this comes with a picture of septuagenarian owner Tom Hicks in a nurse outfit — certainly wouldn't hurt the female fanbase — but really? Is this quasi-suggestion, said with a shrug and follow-up "or we could just watch a movie," really what their 2008 campaign will focus on?

In the smallest division in baseball, none of the major publications picked Texas to finish better than third - but we all know Brainiac incarnate Billy Beane won't let his squad become bottom-feeders. The Rangers boast a decent offense - nothing spectacular, yet they'll get their fair share of runs - but let's look at the current team-wide pitching line as of Friday: 5.49 ERA, 1.72 WHIP, and 130 ER in 213 IP. Ouch. Hopefully the Rangers will pay for their pitchers' therapy bills. With those numbers, the Rangers are bordering on warranting an investigation into throwing games.

So I ask again, would you want to be Jon Daniels? Because as the youngest GM since two-time WS-champion Theo Epstein, it may be time to start looking for a new job.