For the past few days, I've been labeling my Gmail chat status with some Public Enemy lyrics for lack of anything funny to write.  I also recently completed a hardcore marathon of all five seasons of HBO's The Wire.  Lotta gangsta rap in that.  So I decided to try to find Ice T's O.G. (Original Gangster) CD online.  While doing this, Bill Wither's song "Use Me" popped into my head.

Now take a completely random but still slightly coherent segue into my brain.  As I was staring at the computer screen, trying to think of music that I really miss and no longer own, Tori Amos came across my brain, Bill Wither's still singing the same lines over and over.
 
"I'm gonna spread the news / That if feels this good being used / Just keep on using me / Till you use me up"

Tori Amos, Dido, Sarah Mclachlan, all of these women were a part of my life.  Sarah Mclachlan and I hooked up before I started dating Amy back at SIU.  Of course, I introduced Amy (ex-wife #1) to Sarah and she was a significant portion of our lives during our relationship.  We went to see her perform while we were dating.  And then, one day, I walked out on Sarah and Amy.  Just left them hanging.

I've listened to my Sarah Mclachlan CD (Fumbling Towards Ecstasy) a few times in the last year.  I still enjoy it, but still most of those songs were the soundtrack of my first few months with Amy.  Thankfully, the only Sarah song that seems to get any airplay anymore is "Angel" which by then, I think she was out of my life.
 
Same thing happened with me and Dido.  I introduced Summer (#2 and most recent ex-wife) to her.  "Here With Me" was the first song I ever gave to Summer.  She had reciprocated with "Silent All These Years" by Tori Amos.  That was her song.  We saw Tori at least three times in concert and had her posters in the house.  I still have a concert shirt from her Strange Little Girls tour.  I still wear it even after my friend Jason said, "Nice shirt.  Did your boyfriend buy it for you?" 
 
What's not surprising here is that Dido dumped both of us: Me and Summer.  But Tori dumped me.  Okay, maybe it was a mutual decision by Tori and myself.  Come to think of it, Melissa Etheridge dumped me too.  Damn it!  No wonder I took that divorce the hardest.

I've listened to a few Tori songs too.  Played them on the internet jukebox at Kitty's.  "Talula," "Past the Mission," and maybe some "Cornflake Girl" but these songs still take me to a different time and place, a whole other life, really.
 
Dido and I don't talk.  Ever.  Whenever I hear her song "White Flag" she makes my heart ache.  Same with "Thank You" and especially "Here With Me".  The last time I heard the latter, I was drunk at Murphy's being an asshole after Dido and Summer had left me.  Summer was there with her boyfriend, Buz, the illegal alien from Britain or something, and I was feeling mean and self-destructive.  So I popped some money in the jukebox, played "Here with Me".  The song didn't last very long.  Buz was a bartender at Murphy's (on I-Drive in Orlando) so he had access to the remote control to the jukebox.  I looked over and Summer was crying.