Blogcritics Comments on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Comment by Matthew T. Sussman on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Fri, 5 Oct 2007 10:04:04 EDT

Racism, JOM! Ha! Brilliance! [headdesk]

Comment by Cindy D on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Fri, 5 Oct 2007 08:59:32 EDT

"The only 'poverty' we have here is the kind where a family lives in their own personal 1000 sq ft home, has two vehicles and TV's, and whines because they can't buy a 2000 ft home and afford brand new vehicles," Doug says as he looks out over his white neighborhood in Disneyland.

Comment by justoneman on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Thu, 4 Oct 2007 16:59:43 EDT

Presidential candidate Barack Obama announced today that, if elected, he will provide one-free bucket of fried chicken and a whole watermellon per week to all Americans. "My peoples love dat chicken and watermellon", said the mixed race junior senator. He then went on to pull his Americam Flag lapel pin off and replaced it with a Crescent Moon and Star pin. JOM

Comment by Clavos on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Thu, 4 Oct 2007 11:33:01 EDT

"Then many, if not most, hospitals in poor communities are administered by criminals. There are many hospitals in not so poor areas that are administered by criminals." Actually, not all hospitals are required to accept patients regardless of their ability to pay, except to the point of stabilizing them and treating emergency life-threatening conditions so they can be transported to the hospital (there's at least one in every metro area), that IS designated to accept indigent patients. For example, here in Miami, Jackson Memorial Hospital, which is jointly owned by the city and the University of Miami, is so designated. JMH is also the largest, and in many disciplines, the best hospital in South Florida.

Comment by Les Slater on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Thu, 4 Oct 2007 10:00:17 EDT

"...hospitals are required by law to treat anyone that walks in with any kind of acute symptom..." Then many, if not most, hospitals in poor communities are administered by criminals. There are many hospitals in not so poor areas that are administered by criminals.

Comment by Cindy D on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Thu, 4 Oct 2007 09:51:50 EDT

Government's job isn't to insure basic necessities. People are greedy and lazy. If the government was handing out $40k/year jobs all the lazy people who work at Walmart would be lining up to get a hand-out. I'm sure half of them can read as well as someone in India. I don't see why they don't just go and get job doing phone tech support. I hear there is a shortage of people skilled enough to read English. I hear American companies would happily pay $15/hour (plus benefits) to someone with this skill.

Comment by Doug Hunter on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Thu, 4 Oct 2007 09:46:57 EDT

I find it interesting that there are still morons supporting marxist ideas that have resulted in the greatest genocides in human history, created massive oppression and violent police states, and kept the entire population in poverty and breadlines. (but all equally, no one to be jealous of as everyone had nothing) No basic necesities in the US. That's got to be a fucking joke. The only 'poverty' we have here is the kind where a family lives in their own personal 1000 sq ft home, has two vehicles and TV's, and whines because they can't buy a 2000 ft home and afford brand new vehicles. Bread isn't gotten in a line or at ridiculous prices on the black market, it's stocked as fucking high as the eye can see in large rotting piles any number of stores and costs but a few cents. There is no starvation, hospitals are required by law to treat anyone that walks in with any kind of acute symptom, public water and restrooms are plentiful and free, shelters are rarely full in most areas. The basic necessities of life ar met in the US and I challenge you to show any different in anything but a handful of extreme cases. In any case, I can show you equally horrific stories probably higher in number in any of your precious police states.

Comment by Les Slater on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Thu, 4 Oct 2007 08:34:26 EDT

I find it interesting that this piece is written as satire. What I see is a giddy admission that the capitalist economic system cannot even provide the basic necessities to its population. Why not respond to the demand for bread with an offer of cake? Satire, yes, but most revealing.

Comment by Matthew T. Sussman on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 23:28:39 EDT

Mike Gravel promised to take out the garbage for a week if his wife showed up at his rally.

Comment by Cindy D on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 23:07:07 EDT

Well written piece. And very funny. RJ, Did you write those additions? Hilarious!

Comment by RJ on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 19:35:24 EDT

Doc: No, I'm sure I'll receive death threats from supporters of illegal immigrants who think I'm advocating child abuse...

Comment by Dr Dreadful on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 19:16:50 EDT

RJ: quick learner, aren't you? Now you get satire...

Comment by Baronius on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 17:54:27 EDT

Kucinich '08!

Comment by RJ on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 17:49:35 EDT

Presidential candidate Ron Paul announced today that he doesn't intend to give anybody jack shit. "Fuck you all, you greedy welfare scum," said the Congressman from Texas. "Lazy filth like you deserves to be deported to Namibia. Also, I oppose the war in Iraq."

Comment by RJ on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 17:45:25 EDT

Presidential candidate Mike Gravel announced today that, if elected, he will provide free mental health services to all Americans. "It's desperately needed," said the former Senator. He then went chasing after invisible unicorns with an aluminum softball bat.

Comment by RJ on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 17:39:25 EDT

In a major announcement, Presidential candidate Tom Tancredo today promised every American a pi�ata if he is elected. "The pi�ata will be made from real, authentic, live Mexican children," the Congressman said. "The cool thing is, the sweets inside are their vital organs."

Comment by RJ on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 17:33:15 EDT

At a speech before the AFSCME, Dennis Kucinich today promised that, if elected, he will ensure that all short, dorky guys get to nail a hot European hippie chick half their age. "This is something the American people want, and therefore it would be my solemn obligation as President to provide it," said the short, dorky Presidential candidate.

Comment by RJ on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 17:26:59 EDT

Fred Thompson today declared that, if elected, he will provide a 42" HDTV-ready plasma television to every citizen. "That way, every American can watch Law & Order reruns in style," said the former Senator. "With an HDTV plasma screen, underprivileged Americans will be have a clear view of every liver spot on my giant, bald head."

Comment by RJ on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 17:21:17 EDT

Great article! :-)

Comment by Baronius on Satire: Politicians Promise Money, Cars and Jobs for Life

Wed, 3 Oct 2007 16:28:41 EDT

I don't need a college fund, but which candidate will make me smart enough to handle college?