Cheng, undaunted by this incredible series of misfortunes, moves ahead with his nefarious scheme to destroy the local railway system. If all goes according to his best laid plans, the wealthy passengers aboard the Millionaire's Express will be forced to spend a few luxurious days in town, effectively boosting the local economy in the process. What Cheng hasn't prepared for, however, is a trio of skilled Japanese samurai, a squadron of hired muscle, and a gang of cutthroat Chinese bandits hellbent on lightening the wallets of everyone aboard the train. When the rancid fecal matter finally hits the electric fanning device, Cheng and his enemies must join forces to combat the legion of thieves who have effectively taken over this zany one-horse town.

If you're brutally unfamiliar with Hung's unique brand of crude slapstick comedy, Millionaire's Express might not be the greatest film you've ever laid eyes upon. More importantly, those expecting wall-to-wall action may be more than a little disappointed with their purchase. While there are a few death-defying stunts and a handful of superbly choreographed confrontations peppered throughout the first hour or so, the hardcore kung fu madness really doesn't make its presence known until the final act. This, of course, will leave the unsuspecting viewer with more Chinese comedy than they know what to do with. For some, this will definitely be a problem.

Of course, the film's highly explosive fight-filled finale is certainly worth mentioning. Not only do we get an insanely enjoyable Sammo Hung/Cynthia Rothrock showdown to feast our kung fu-hungry tummies upon, we're also presented with an abundance of amazing martial arts hijinks courtesy of the always impressive Yuen Biao, Australian fight master Richard Norton, Japanese legend Yasuaki Kurata, and countless other Asian cinema staples. The stunning choreography witnessed during the climax has aged rather well, proving yet again that nobody does action quite like the talented Mr. Hung.

A word of advice: Please don't go into Millionaire's Express expecting something along the lines of Shanghai Noon. The humor is much funnier, the story is smarter, and the action is guaranteed to leave multiple skidmarks in your father's tattered tighty whities. Again, if you've never had the pleasure of viewing a Sammo Hung comedy, be prepared for lots of crude sexual innuendo, dozens of crazy sight gags, and approximately 86 cubic tons of Hong Kong action. Dragon Dynasty continues to impress me with the quality of their releases, and if Millionaire's Express is any indication, this company is ready and willing to dig deep for their titles.

Here's hoping for a snazzy Region 1 release of Wheels on Meals sometime soon.