I Don't Care Who You Are - That's Funny!! - Headlines
Published May 22, 2007
W. VA Man Sleeps Through Gunshot to Head, Notices Blood When He Wakes
A small-caliber bullet struck a 37-year old Huntington, WV man in the head as he slept, but he didn’t realize it until he awoke nearly four hours later and noticed blood coming from his head. He had returned from a night on the town Saturday night…
...reminds me of a song:
Could have been the whiskey, might have been the gin.
Could have been the three or four six packs, I don’t know,
But look at the shape I’m in.
My head is like a football, I think I’m gonna die.
Me oh me oh my.
Wasn’t that a party?
Wasn’t That a Party – Tom Paxton (1980)
In Paternity Suit, DNA Matches Two Dads!
The Miller twins are the father and uncle to a 3-year-old girl. The problem is – they’re not sure who is who. Both are claiming the other is the father, since neither wants to pay child support. Both admit to having relations with the baby’s mother on the same day…
It’s fairly obvious that these two geniuses were conjoined twins who shared a brain at birth, and the brain did not survive…
…but I smell a sitcom here!! The kid gets dropped off with the Mensa twins and each tries to get the other to reimburse for movies, snacks, meals and clothes. When the plot gets stale, we can bring in other kids from the mother and their dads as well, and we’ll call it My Two Dads. We’ll get the judge to award joint custody to the twins and then the judge will buy the building and move in next door. I’m thinking Paul Reiser and Greg Evigan as the dads and Emma Sands as the mom and…wait a minute, this is all starting to sound really familiar…okay, okay, here’s another one…
Clown Hired To Cheer Up Monkeys
A German zoo has hired a clown to stop its monkeys from getting bored…
- I Don't Care Who You Are - That's Funny!! - Headlines
- Published: May 22, 2007
- Type: Satire
- Section: Culture
- Filed Under: Culture: Humor and Satire, Culture: Media, Culture: Society
- Part of a feature: I Don't Care Who You Are - That's Funny!!
- Writer: Rick Vassar
- Rick Vassar's BC Writer page
- Rick Vassar's personal site
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