This is the kid who told us two weeks ago that his mission was to “show America [he] can sing”. While it was nice to see that hubris hadn’t gotten the better of him and tipped him headfirst into a boiling vat of delusion (yes, I mean you Antonella!) like the one some of his fans were wallowing in, it also made me feel bad for him.

Look, he’s a nice kid. I’ve said that from the beginning and I maintain it till this day. The "Smugjaya" (thanks, Kaonashi!) that emerged to flutter its beastly wings in the past few weeks was entirely the result of a weak defense mechanism. Actually, I think in real life he’d just have taken his constant spankings and gone to his room to soak his pillow with tears. But that puts a damper on everyone’s fun, so I don’t doubt the producers were feeding him lines and propping him up to be as mean as he could (which wasn’t much).

It is worth noting that not even at the very bottom of the trough that has been his Idol experience did he exhibit the levels of sullenness shown by Chicken Little. Nor did he try to justify his bad singing a la Chris Timberfake this week ("nasally" is a style of singing? Ri-i-ght). And he didn’t try to smother his defeats under a cloak of fake-cool like the Fro Patro guy.

All in all, my pet object of hate this season has been very unsatisfactory. First of all, I couldn’t enjoy hating him because every time I did (which was every time he sang) I felt like I was kicking a puppy. Nor could I properly enjoy the full extent of his bizarreness because as soon as I tried, I felt like I was getting played. I don’t like the sensation of being a puppet on a string and every time I winced at Sanjaya I could feel the producers gloating at having hit the jackpot in a contestant who simultaneously made me laugh, hate, fear, and pity.

Laugh because he’s such a dork and nobody ever gets too old to laugh at dorks. Hate because I’m not tone deaf and there were a couple of songs he butchered that I really liked but now will never be able to hear without remembering his (shudder) version. Fear because Idol really would have gone down the toilet (at least for me) if he’d ended up a finalist and I don’t want to give up my yearly fix of crazy beeyotches auditioning to get their miserable dreams shot to smithereens on national television. And pity because the only thing this kid ever did wrong was take a chance on his dreams and look where he ended up.