The onslaught of people who have recently started their own businesses attests to one thing: people like to be their own boss. This way, if they dislike the person they work for, they can actually do something about it. For the rest of us, those of us who are not entrepreneurs or trailblazers of a company, a boss just comes with the territory. Having a boss in an office is as essential as having a cubicle.

Some bosses are fun. They go to happy hours and pick up the tab. Others are not fun. They yell at their employees and refuse to throw a holiday party. Fun, not fun, or somewhere in the middle, speaking to your boss can be a bit intimidating. They hold your career in the palm of their hand, but with a few simple tips, you may find that taking an issue to your boss doesn’t have to leave you needing a tissue.

Have Specific Examples: Nothing can diffuse a person’s point quicker than a lack of examples. If you have no evidence, you simply have no case. For this reason, before even entering your boss’s office, be sure you have specific examples to back up your claim. If you’re going to assert that you deserve a raise, for instance, you better have a list of reasons why.

Don’t Get Emotional: Getting emotional is human nature. We all do it from time to time, and often at the most inconvenient times. Talking to your boss is one of those times. Despite your emotions wanting to guide you, telling you how to act, how to react, and what to say, don’t let them. Remaining calm, rational, and in control is the best chance you have at your boss taking you seriously. Yelling, accusing, and throwing things won’t only lead to your boss not listening to you, but it will also lead to security escorting you out.

Ask Questions: One of the best ways to get your boss to see your point is by asking them questions about theirs. If they refuse to give you a raise you feel you deserve, ask them why and then ask them what kind of things you can improve that may eventually lead to them changing their mind. If you still don’t agree with what they have to say, ask them if there is a way you can compromise. Asking your boss questions, rather than just demanding you get your way immediately, suggests that you are willing to work with your boss to meet somewhere in the middle.

Don’t Use Gossip as Evidence: Companies can discourage rumors spreading through an office all they want, but it will be to no avail. Gossip, quite frankly, happens. While this is just something that comes with the office environment, it’s something that should be left outside your boss’s door. When you go in to speak to your boss, leave the rumors, the gossip, and the hearsay behind. Not only is this kind of talk not valid — and possibly not true — it’s also hard to relay gossip to your boss without selling out some of your coworkers.

When it comes down to it, your boss, like you, is just a person who puts on their business suit one leg at a time. Many bosses are rational and genuinely care about the happiness of their employees. Your boss may be more receptive than you think. If they’re not (they scream, condescend, and make an art out of being stubborn), then simply remember these two words: corporate embezzlement.