In the most stunning and perfect casting decision ever made, I have decided to officially announce that Courtney Love is being strongly considered by me to play Anna Nicole Smith. Seriously, do you see how much sense this makes? They are perfect for each other. Had Courtney died first, I would be writing this piece about Anna Nicole playing her. Not since Courtney auditioned to play the female lead in Sid & Nancy has such a choice been so obvious.

Courtney did not get that role, so instead opted to live it. Yeah, weird stuff. Courtney and Anna remind me of each other because I am both turned on by and revolted by them both. Also, has either one been sober ever in the public eye even once? What a weird tale that was, and Courtney could share it well. She is a terrific actress, and has lived a near parallel life to that of Smith. Courtney could use a comeback. If history is any indication - she is somehow broke.

How does she pull that off? Last year, for the first time in 30 years, someone besides Elvis was the dead celeb who made the most money - Kurt Cobain. How does Courtney end up broke every few years? I have two words for you: Whitney Houston. Ms Love, if you can live long enough, throw us a bone and do this film. In order to really capture the weird of this whole thing, we’ll get Charlie Kaufman to write the script. Director? Paul Thomas Anderson, because I just love everything he does. Soundtrack? Rick Rubin seems too obvious, so I go with the amazing Brendan O'Brian.

What do y'all think of my casting choices? Jared Leto as Kurt - that kid has the spooky soulful eyes. As Billy Corgan? Jim Carrey! Wait, wait, wait, we are casting the Anna Nicole story, not the Courtney Love story. I get ahead of myself. At this time of night, they are interchangeable in my mind.