She could be in a committed relationship, could be a lesbian, could be grieving a loss of some sort, could be having her time of the month, or could be having a bad day for any other number of reasons. You simply may not be her type, and that's okay, too. Wouldn't you agree that's it's better to know up front?

With all that put together, and assuming you are her type, you have a 20% chance (at best) of succeeding when you approach a woman. That's life; deal with it. This bears repeating. At any given time, a woman may not be interested in any man whatsoever. Accept that and go on. It's just a fact of life.

The key point here is not to take it personally and go hide in the closet. Follow your heart and approach all the women you feel attracted to. You will find one, or more, that you really click with. Have fun and don't take life so seriously.

How to approach her - the magical ice breaker

Now that we're past that, it's time to actually move in. She's not going to know you like her if she doesn't know you exist, so let's get on with it. Simply go talk to her. There's no magic to it. Just go over there and make some small talk. Don't be overly eager and don't have a firm agenda. Just say hello and see what happens.

Let her feel you out.

Think of two dogs when they first meet - they growl a little and spend lots of time sniffing each other. People do the same thing, really. It's all about getting a feel for the other person. We like to think we're more evolved than lower animals like dogs, but they actually have a lot to teach us. I've yet to ever meet a person that's as pure at heart as a dog.

Ask her out - leaving the "Friend Zone"

At some point you're going to have to make your move and depart the friend zone. This may not be in the first minute or two, and may not even be the first time you talk to her. The key here again is self-confidence. You'll also need a little patience.

Take your time and feel it out first. Don't make her choose until you know she's comfortable enough with you to give you a chance and you're comfortable enough to take the chance.

The sex and physical attraction issue

Most guys assume that men and women want drastically different things, and sex is something that's to be won over from the woman - like a special gift. Wrong! That's a very dangerous perspective that will leave you doing the sex thing all by yourself for a long time.

Many years ago my father gave me a bit of insight on this. He said, "She wants it just as much as you do." In my early teens that nugget didn't really do much for me, but as I grew into an adult, that advice took on special meaning. It's important to remember that women want and need companionship (and yes, even sex) just as much as men do.