Fact #2: Good looking girls get dozens of winks and messages in any given day. You can have the most awesome profile and you can send her the most intriguing message, but she may never see it. How come? Simple; once again, women with good online profiles get lots of winks and messages every day. Give her a reason to open your message first! It has to stand out among all the others or it has a high chance of getting deleted and never read.

Spend just as much time crafting an intriguing subject line as you do in writing the rest of your message. Ask her a question or specifically reference some detail in her profile so that she will know you actually read it and are truly interested in more than just her looks.

Mistake #4: Sending her a vague, generic or otherwise lame message

You made the effort to become a paying member of a dating site and want to make the most of your membership, but then you came up with a standard boilerplate message and you quickly copied and pasted it to dozens of girls.

Go you! At least that's what you think. Okay, reality check.

Women like to feel special and important. They can smell a lame form message a mile away, and the delete button is always close at hand. Why not take a different approach? Actually read her entire profile (we know it's painful, but do it anyway), learn everything you can about her, and then send her an insightful, personal message.

Remember, you're messaging her and she needs to feel she is the only girl in the entire world that you are interested in. Keep your messages fairly short and concise. Compliment or make reference to some thing or things you found interesting in her profile. Conclude each message with a “clear call to action”. Always be friendly and polite, but tell her what you would like her to do next.

Don't leave her wondering. An example is “talk to you soon” or “drop me a line.”

Mistake #5: Taking too long to respond to her message

With all the buzz around the seduction and “pick up artist” community these days, many guys are afraid of scaring women away by appearing too eager or desperate. They get her message and then wait, and wait, and wonder when it's okay to answer her.