In the meantime, our youngest lost a tooth. I remember it vividly because she coughed, spit, and bled on the desk of the housing lady who was none too keen on my older children. They had decorated the entrance to her office with a stack of multi-colored post-it notes she'd given them. "Here," she said "Play with this." I thought at the time, "Does she think they're younger than they are?"

We put thoughts of the Tooth Fairy on the back burner while browsing binders for available homes and then dismantling what turned out to be one of the most physics-defying feats of construction I'd ever seen. Once done with the woman's door, the older two went on to the waiting room where they'd created a 3d replica of the Eiffel Tower. It was unbelievably accurate and quite colorful. It was also so stable that when anyone opened the door and let in the windy day, it barely moved. Even my normally stoic husband said, "I, uh, I hate to tear it down." The five of us stood there and exchanged heartfelt glances. It was a rare moment of family unity given the close and irritable quarters of what was day 88 at that point. The housing lady stepped in with a trashcan and all was lost in less than a minute.

I ask you, have you forgotten about my youngest child’s tooth? We did. She woke up the next morning and found no coin beneath her pillow. The tooth had fallen to the floor in the night. She came alongside our bed in quiet shock, eking out that what her friends in North Carolina had told her must be true: there was no Tooth Fairy in Europe. She collapsed in tears with the realization that there must also be (doom, doom, doom) No Santa!

The letterhead of the International Council of Legendary Figures (ICLF) didn't exist until I created it on the base library computer. For the benefit of anyone reading this who is under the age of 10, I'm kidding. The next morning, our daughter rose from her cot to show us the letter she'd received along with a crisp five Euro bill. It explained how her trans-Atlantic relocation packet had been held up in France. When push comes to shove, blame the French - that's my motto. The jump in compensation from a coin to a bill was because of the currency conversion. Apparently the Euro was doing badly against the dollar in ICLF-land. (What. Don't look at me that way.) When the problem with her relocation was discovered, the ICLF expedited her transfer and faxed a copy of it straight to the North Pole. Santa not only existed, he knew where she was.