As a procrastinator par excellence, I can think of no better tool than the Internet to help me put things off while acquiring the kind of knowledge that ought to make me a master of Trivial Pursuit, if only I could spare the time for it. And when I've finished mining Wikipedia and am done zooming about on Google Earth, I like to take in a video or twenty, about pretty much nothing at all.

This week: Man of the Year

Back in the day, when Yahoo was firmly committed to its policy of dragging its feet, the Buzz used to be a little box on the home page. It simply told you what most people were searching for on Yahoo. From celebrities to freak shows, it gave you stats and numbers with a touch of humor while providing you with links to the various items in case you wanted to see what the fuss was all about. I liked the Buzz. It demanded nothing of me.

Now, as Yahoo begins to experiment with change, the Buzz has a new avatar and comes in video. Last week, they had a little segment on the new Robin Williams movie Man of the Year, in which he plays a guy who hosts a successful fake news show a la The Daily Show before running for President of the United States.

In going for this screenplay, the filmmakers obviously knew things I didn't, such as the fact that there's actually a real campaign out there beseeching Jon Stewart to run for President. Let me first say that I love Jon Stewart and The Daily Show, but if you're rooting for him to become President then I can't help but think that maybe you ought to nominate his entire writing team. Hey, that would solve a lot of problems, like the one about too much power in the hands of one man. Stewart, however, says he and Stephen Colbert have no political ambitions as they're a lot smarter than that. Damn.

But a Stewart/Colbert ticket isn't the only one receiving attention. Next on the list is Man of the Year co-star Christopher Walken. I think the person who thought of President Walken is a genius. But as it turns out, the site is a joke. Too bad.

Then there's George Clooney and you know you want him for President. Think about it — you'd never have to listen to any sanctimonious speeches about morals and values because, hey, he's from Hollywood. Of course, that never stopped Reagan, but still... And with a face and voice like that, you'd actually be happy when he cuts into your favorite TV show to give you a figurative pat on the head. But Clooney says he'd rather make movies and hold hands with Leonardo di Caprio. I don't blame him.

Last comes the one celebrity that I knew a lot of people want to see run for President — Oprah. From Michael Moore to the guy she sued because he had a website asking her to run. Personally, I always thought that was a little extreme. I mean, being President can't be that bad. Until I heard what I now think of as The Song and I just want to say... Oprah, I understand. Oh, how I understand.