I recently was reunited with an old love with whom there was never a bad moment.

We are both married him with children.

At 45 we know that we are attracted to each other and like each other as people but will not cheat on our spouses. Don't have an affair with someone who is married. Love him or her for who they are and not what they could be for you.

If they do not want to be Just friends while they are married to some one else than wish them well and walk away -they will be mad but they will respect you ( and maybe come looking for you when they do get dvorced)

Peace
Lee

Your feelings don't matter to him, he only cares about himelf and what make him happy! Take a step back for a minute and really think about it. It relqationship is not going to get any better, you are not going to be happy you'll be doing a lot of waiting on wondering every minute of every day. Is he going to call me, is he going to come by ? What's he telling his wife, is he sleeping with his wife? You'd like to throw him a party or take him out on the town for his birthday, can't do it , the wife has got him and their having a good time, you are the last person, if that, on his mind!!How about holiday's, no can do either, Wife has him. What about your birthday? If he makes it by , don't think he's going to take you out for your birthday. He's not going to take you anywhere and take a chance he might see someone he knows from his other life, he's gonna tell you what you want to hear. Tell you how fine you look and how he wants you all to himself, blhaa, blhaa, blhaa.
Always looking at his watch, asking what time we it is. I could go on, but won't.
you end up planning your world around their's. Your going to be very disappointed, your feeling are going to get hurt,it will tear your heart out. But never fear, he'll come along and tell ya what you want to hear and make it all better, and not because he loves you or he's sorry he hurt your feelings, Because he's just going to do it again, and again and again, I gaurentee you, Remember the only one he cares about being happy is himself. Then maybe his wife, needs to try and keep her happy so he can come see you when he gets bored with her.
Better to get out now, I wish I had, it's been 7 years, that's along time too long! 7 years gone and he no closer to leaving his wife then he was 7 years ago. You should be #1 in the man's life that you love.HE IS NOT GOING TO LEAVE HIS WIFE FOR YOU, EVER!

It doesn't matter what you do with that married man he always goes back to his wife. I am in love with a married man right now and have given almost everything he has asked for including a baby gurl and one on the way. he has one boy by his wife and several more by other women before he has gotten married.whatever u do can not make no married man leave his wife

i no exactly how you feel its happened to me to every one has there opinions but it cant change how you feel no matter what people say/'hell only goo back to his wife'!its hard to stop loving someone no matter how hard we try!my advise being in the same position as you is its too hard to stop loving him married or not!whether you tell him how you feel or not it doesn't matter really but the real question you need to ask him and yourself is some one will get hurt no matter what so does he love you enough? if hes the man for you and wants you he'll make the choice that you and him both need be with or with out you!its so hard but if its not meant to be then you have to move on how i rely don't no but it will only make you ill in the end!ask him and he'll decide! x its got to be you or his wife!

All the comments that other has posted in here are true. I can tell you that by own experience where my husband was shitting on me with another women, then I discovered and that was the end to that relationship, remember nothing last forever. You need to enjoy your life and always put yourself first, don't let no men put you down.

Good Luck

You should try to think. I know it's hard but you have to. If he leaves his wife for you, after a while he'll get bored of you too and then you'll always wonder if he is cheating on you too. Would you like another woman to do what you are doing to his wife??? Think about it

I wish someone had told me 3 years ago what i think i already knew deep down inside.. a married man will not leave his wife AFTER beginning an affair with another woman. If the marriage is so "bad" or "unhappy" he would be trying to leave in the first place not trying to find the fix to make him feel better about things.
I don't condemn women who fall in love with married men but we need to be stronger and value ourselves more. We are worthy of men who can love us and commit to us full time not only when it is convenient and comforting for them.

Actions speak louder than words. Its a timeless saying for a reason-- It's true!
Best of luck to all women involved with married men.. get yourself out while you can! Love shouldn't hurt.

I've been involved in a pseudo-marriage with a married man for almost 10 years. We were both married when it started; I left my marriage because the double life was too hard and my ex husband deserved to be with someone who really loved him and that wasn't me. Things between myself and my married guy have gotten so bumpy lately because he's been trying to leave his family even though I've told him he doesn't have to just yet. His girls are 12 and 15 now but are both emotional messes because their mother is too busy with her own life to care much about them. He is both father and mother to them; they both called dad when they started their periods - what does that tell you? Anyways, I tend to believe that someday he will leave to be with me, but we're not getting any younger. I am 12 years older than he is and should have known better years ago, but was so attracted to him I knew I found the one. I've invested so much into this relationship, and it's not easy to just say forget it after alll this time. Does anyone have any advice. Don't lecture, because I already know all the things we've done wrong. I'm worried about his health now as this turmoil he's created by the years of telling them he's leaving and then not following through is killing him.

There is no good advice. There's advice that is "morally right", advice that is all about self-respect, and there's advice that focuses on what if he does come to you, will he cheat on you?

None of that matters when people are in love. What I hear is women asking for help where they are: in love with a married man. And the bottom line is that it isn't very different than being in love with a man who is not fully available for other reasons: a mother, an illness, an addiction... It's the same in many ways. Take the good when you can and try to ride out the bad. And maybe one of you can start an on-line support group for each other... but shield yourselves from the harsher critics. Good luck.

Hey,
I can relate to some the ladies on the site. I always said that i would not let myself get too attracted or invoved with a mm. There is a guy who works at my job that I adore. We have been "work" friends for 2 years now and just recently we crossed the line. After a work party we got drunk and I allowed him to perform oral sex on me. Now I am in a relationship of my own that the sexual aspect of it is lacking. Don't get me wrong, my own bf is sweet and reliable. I will not leave him for this. However, it does feel good to have some extra flirtation at work. Im not dub, I am trying to keep my sexual distance from him and I have considered every possible outcome to this situation including him staying with his wife or leaving his wife and cheating on me. I just dont care right now because I like how I feel right now. We are getting to know each other as friends and its cool. I know my limitations and a do have a good distraction (my bf).. I will not sit around and wait for him.. hell, I might not even like him enough to be his woman full time.. *wink* Shes gotta deal with the shitty sides of him too.. I dont. In some ways I wish we didnt work together though..Sometimes its tough to see the wedding ring just because Im jealous.. I think its a good idea for women to examine exactly what they feel for the mm. It could be that you just like him alot or that you like how he makes you feel... That doesn't equal love.. Would you change his shitty bedpan if he were sick.. hmmm.. i know i would't at this point.. thats his wifes job.(lol)
What are your thoughts??

i am with the same situation too... i felt very bad for myself... i am 23 and the man i loved so much is 30.. i've decided many times to leave him.. but every time i told him he never want me to... he promised me that he will fix everything but he never explain to me if are we going to separate or he will leave his wife... until now im still waiting for that promised...i really don't know what to do.. i can't even ask an advice from my mom .. =( he ask me if im willing to accept him and wer gonna leave in our place and go to wer nobody know us..i said to him that he better fix his marriage..i am really not that stupid.. i still thinks for the best.. but i can't help it i just really love him.. and i know he love me too... i need some advice pls... GOD SPEED!!!!

In answer to Danni's comments, yes I would. I met my mm only 6 months ago, purely with the intention of friendship. But, almost immediately, we 'clicked' in every manner and laughed continously as we held hands and walked for miles and miles. It was a good few months before our affair began, and, since then, my love for him has grown and grown. I would give my life for this wonderful man and adore every moment I am with him. But, along with the joy, there is so much pain. Knowing that he is sleeping with his wife, knowing that he shares time with her and knowing that I am only a fragment of his life and will probably never become a complete part of. So, ladies, weigh it up. If you can handle part time love - great. But, if you are like me and miss him most of the time - think twice. I am in too deep now, but you need never make the same error as I have. It hurts - trust me!

Scary! Ouch! Confusing, fractured love. He has love for you, although not a complete love. You love him, but it cannot be complete.

Well, at ths moment, have no expectations. You two are just filling holes of love in each other's lives. Almost like each other's 'love repairmen'.

You two are not in a position with each other to be the real deal. The love you feel is real, but far from the whole deal.

Respect the situation. don't ask too much of it.

xo
DM