In A Slump - Saturn Moon Conjunction: Astrology-Based Advice
Published March 31, 2006
Hi Elsa,
My boyfriend and I are kind of in a slump.
He's going through a divorce right now. We're living together, but he's pulling away - either due to depression or just mental chaos over his divorce. I've become more needy as he's pulled away.
I know my needs are important but I also know men can be like children in so many ways... and that most of the time, it's up to the woman to keep things going. I have two questions. What can I tell myself so I can be more supportive of him? And will this slump end?
Girlfriend in a Slump
Dear Girlfriend,
I don't agree that men are child-like. I also don't agree that it's a woman's job to maintain the relationship. Just for the record! I think these views are personal to you, with your Cancer moon (mothering) conjunct Saturn (responsible / burden) and your packed 7th house (immense desire to be in a relationship).
Most woman wouldn't take this guy on in the first place... considering that he's still married! Now I'm sorry, but I don't think your slump with this guy will ever end. Let's see. You got in a relationship with him, before he'd ended an existing one. Before he'd suffered any kind of void, where he might have had the chance to examine things and learn something.
Can you see you're mothering him? You don't have a partner here, you have a dependent. Anyone carrying this kind of burden is going to be slumped!
As for your first question, "What can I tell yourself so I can be more supportive?" I think it's the wrong question to be asking. Here are some better questions:
- Why am I supporting a man who is not supporting me?
- Why did I get in a relationship with a married man?
- Why did I move in with a married man?
- Am I depressed? (I think you are)
- Why am I more worried about this man than I am about myself?
Good luck.
Pictured: Motherhood, ©2005 Buz Tafoya, Oil on canvas
Visit Elsa @ ElsaElsa - The Astrology Blog She has also written a book, "Heaven, I Mean Circle K" which will be published this year.
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- In A Slump - Saturn Moon Conjunction: Astrology-Based Advice
- Published: March 31, 2006
- Type: Opinion
- Section: Culture
- Filed Under: Culture: Society, Culture: Family and Relationships
- Writer: Elsa
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- Elsa's personal site
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On reading this by mistake [wanted to read some silly astrology subject] I just have to answer from man's view LOL. Hope you get it.
Man's job in life is to screw as many as possible for insuring spread of seed.
Woman's job is keep man honest enough to help raise children. Anything else is extra!
Your guy is married and getting rid of 1 for another. If there's kids involved then duck. You just entered a battle zone. I'll put it in woman's terms; Your choice if you get thumped on by both and end up the sucker?
Forget feelings for a minute, you willing to last the battle out and see if maybe “only maybe” you get boyfriend out of it? To put it bluntly, up to this point you've been a piece of ass, place to sleep, shoulder to cry on and maybe give what he's not getting with his ex. Get it?