As we all know there is a high rate of illegal immigrants in our country most of which come from Mexico. Nearly half a million people marched in L.A. to protest a proposed law that could lead to a wall being built along the Mexican-American border. Now a lot of people say the illegal immigrants do the jobs no one else wants for an insignificant amount of money, but they are destroying today's youth. If all the most disgusting-back breaking-just-short-of-slave labor jobs are being preformed by immigrants, the jobs left available for American teenagers are almost tolerable. In some cases teens may even like their jobs. This is unacceptable America! Teen jobs need to be so horrible the kids will want to seek higher education. Watch, if the wall goes up I guarantee the percentage of high school graduates going on to college will go up 10%. We need this wall, we just need to figure out who's going to build it.

Monday's "Word" was tense as in past tense. A recent cover of Time Magazine asked, "Was It worth It?" referring to the war in Iraq. Stephen Colbert points out "that suggests the war is over. You cannot judge a war 'til you know the outcome." I completely agree, and add, "Time Magazine, why do you hate our troops?" By asking if the war was worth it, you are showing your lack of support for the war. And, of course, if you don't support the war, you don't support our troops. I am tired of the anti-American news coverage of Time Magazine and CNN. Real Americans only get their news from The Colbert Report, Fox News, and neighborhood gossips. This list is in order of the percent of truthful events reported.

Jack Abramoff needs our help! He has asked his friends to write letters to the judge handling his sentencing, which is on Wednesday. Please put in a good word for Jack. So far, only 260 letters have been received by the judge. America, this is not good enough, that is only 0.00000009% of Americans. Jack was a good old boy that was tricked into doing these evil deeds by peer pressure. I think we can forgive him just this one time.

Stephen had a new list of things to make us cower in fear in a segment called "The Threat Down." Among the list was packaging wrap rage. This, of course, is when you injure yourself by attempting to open an item encased in a protective plastic shell with a sharp object. So I am calling for companies to go to the universally safe wrapping of the tennis ball can or ice cream container; it is up to you. This hard plastic shell has got to go.

Gary Hart was the guest Monday evening. I believe he was the perfect guest. He, with Stephen's help, agreed that wire tapping is good for America. He also called most democrats cowards. As pretty much every guest that comes on the show, he cowered in fear of the great-and-powerful Stephen Colbert. He was on the show to push his book The Shield and The Cloak. I would tell you what it is about, but at that point I got distracted by my popcorn being done.

Question for Stephen

Can I have a dollar?