Email: Glad to know that I didn't miss you reading my email that night.

Skits: New CBS show - I Want to be a Village Person, this time milkmen, dentists, farmers, and plumbers were represented. The most influential group of the 20th century? I almost had to fake my own orgasm over that one.

Then, on to Celebrity Grab Bag: My Plans for Fall - Bill Clinton ("I'm going to be wearing a scary mask for Halloween - Hillary"), Kenny Chesney ("This Fall, I'll be working on a sad song for my new album. What rhymes with Zellweger?"), Renee Zellweger ("Oh, Kenny, you had me at fraud"), Kim Jong-il ("I'm going to stay warm by snuggling up in front of a nice warm nuclear reactor"), Kate Moss ("do I look fat?"). Much silliness, much appreciated. Glad I finally got to see it. I love the bits where you get to put on wigs and slam celebs. It's perverse, but I enjoy it and I freely admit it.

Behind the Scenes Moment: Craig Maintains His Composure During a Power Outage. "I can't believe you actually have huge buildings that were for entertainment purposes. [cue fading lights] That's weird. What happened? We are what the young folks call BLEEP!"

First guest: Susan Sarandon, currently co-starring in Elizabethtown. Incandescent? You called her incandescent? Oh my. I'd hardly call her that. She's many things, but I wouldn't have picked incandescent. Fine, you can have that one. It's a little late for me to quibble over a word at this point.

Susan recalls her stint guest hosting on your set once upon a time. You offered to let her guest host for you while you're off making a sensitive movie like Dead Man Walking. You'd have to play the nun as a tranny, though. That would work. Instead of you in a kilt, it would be you in a habit. A skirt is a skirt is a skirt. Just don't wear anything under the habit.

Rocky Horror Picture Show, you both had a turn at that show. You played Brad, she was Janet. Different productions, though. You both say that Rocky Horror alumni always carry at little bit of the show with you. I'll have to ask my friend-the-actress if that's true in her case as well. It's America's midnight movie. She admitted to dancing around in her underwear sometimes, while you admitted to faking your orgasms when you're alone. Susan said she only fakes when she's getting paid for them. Like in White Palace.

Sarandon spoke about meeting Tim Robbins on the set of Bull Durham, one of my favorite movies. I actually liked her in One of the more interesting comments she made was when you asked if she ever gets jealous when watching Tim in a love scene with someone else. She stated that she feels like she's earning coupons that she can cash in later. I would think it might be a wee bit odd watching someone you love act in an intimate manner onscreen, but wouldn't one have to remember that it's just a movie? It's not as if they're at a bar picking up on someone in front of you. I don't know; I'm not exactly in that sort of situation. No, I only have the guy who gets jealous because I spent a few days on the road with a band (full of nothing but GENTLEMEN). Anyhow, it seems to me that if you marry an actor, love scenes pretty much go with the territory.