REVIEW

24 Season Four Finale: Worst. Episode. Ever.

Written by Temple Stark
Published May 24, 2005

I don't have much else to say. The show was all over the place. There were too many threads trying to be tied off to stop the bleeding, and it was just terrible. The lifeblood of the series drained away.

Tony's dead, then he's not. Jack's dead, then he's not. The Chinese pull the fastest confession ever in the series — all without torture — to implicate Jack in the earlier pratfall assault on the Chinese embassy.

President Logan is a sap and a complete coward without any apparent ability to function under stress except to wet himself. Yet, he's somehow got lackeys prepared to kill for him?

Worst. Episode. Ever. I've liked the series up to now. I've had few complaints. There have been lots of gaps, but nothing that really mattered. This was a back-window disaster that even The Wolf could never clean up.

The Chief of Staff peeks around the corner, through an open door — oh so mysteriously — after hearing a conversation that Jack would be killed by the Secret Service at the behest of Logan's chief of security.

Tony and Michelle smooch and say "I love you" over the phone (something I remember thinking they never did as Michelle faced death in the second series inside that anthraxed hotel building).

Audrey — who fucking hated Jack's guts a couple of hours ago — exchanges I Love You's with Jack, and then she drops all the papers in her hand when she hears that Jack "dies." And she rightfully hated him for showing no respect for the lives of those she cared about.

Drama? Harder to find than a nuke in this episode.

The nuke? What can you say about that terrifying nuke that no one in the country knew about minutes from landing? Other than, "what-evah."

Marwan shot the "nuclear tracker" to pieces , and yet somehow CTU was able to get the info out of it — and it's coming for Los Angeles.

AAaaaaahhhhhhhhyyyyaaaaawn. Burp.

And the nuke! Well, it ended just as any non-lobotomized person thought it would — by being shot down by another missile — after hours of not even being able to find it on a map. With 40 minutes to go when that happened I thought the drama would be that it missed. Nope. The camera shot that ended it all was from a distance that made it look like a dud firework at the city Fourth of July show.

That nuke was conviently programmed to only explode after it reached its destination. Jack knew this despite the fact that the terrorist programmer could have changed that.

I was going to curse the local Fox affiliate for starting the show an hour earlier than advertised, but now I think that was a mercy killing. I would have missed the entire first hour except girlfriend turned on the TV and it was on.

It ends with Jack on the saunter, walking into a large rising sun over railroad tracks like the Marlboro man.

He's a fugitive from justice. Both girlfriend and I thought the same thing: David Banner.

The most exciting moment was Jack's hand getting slashed deeply by Marwan as he forces him to let go and plunge 20 feet from a car park level, ahem, to his splat death.

I probably should have offered a "SPOILER ALERT" at the top of this article, but consider it a favor.

Keep reading for information and comments on this article, and add some feedback of your own!
24 Season Four Finale: Worst. Episode. Ever.
Published: May 24, 2005
Type: Review
Section: Video
Writer: Temple Stark
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Comments

#1 — May 24, 2005 @ 01:02AM — Tim [URL]

I'm relatively new to 24. Although the episode wasn't top notch, after seeing "Revenge of the Sith" two days ago, even a mediocre 24 is a relief.

#2 — May 24, 2005 @ 01:06AM — Temple Stark [URL]

This blew almight chunks through the screen.

This wasn't mediocre - it was beyond redemption.

It was embarassing. And I love 24 - tuned in every damn (I know you'll ove that word) week. Watched it from episode 1, Day 1.

This was .. the worst .. episode ... ever.

Strange Sith standards there.

#3 — May 24, 2005 @ 01:06AM — swingingpuss [URL]

Whatever happened to Behrooz???!!!

Will he grow up to Son of Godzilla, I mean Habib?

#4 — May 24, 2005 @ 01:20AM — Temple Stark [URL]

God damn but next January i'll be tuning in to the next day.

But I'll be much much much much much much much pickier. If it's not Scottish and crap, I'm getting the DVDs of previous seasons. (If I don't have then already.)

There should be a"do over" episode. This was the W..E..E..

Did you watch SP? Aaman? Am I being a bit tetchy.

Did I mention the episode sucked and blowed? (You can use that line in your next book SP :-)

#5 — May 24, 2005 @ 01:30AM — swingingpuss [URL]

Temple, both Aaman and I watched 24 and found it ludicrous, Wondered why the chinese didn't demand lucrative trade agreements or the de-recognition of Taiwan instead of a two bit bureaucrat like Jack.

Well, the blowing somehow left us feeling deflated and not in an uplifted way.



#6 — May 24, 2005 @ 01:32AM — Temple Stark [URL]

Maybe next time then, eh?

[pretend there's an evil grin "smiley" here].

#7 — May 24, 2005 @ 01:36AM — D.C. Spy

Are you kidding me with these negative comments...this episode was an incredible roller coaster.

Completely exhausting.

Great, great show...and the end was totally believable. You can see someone like Jack having to be sacrificed to cover up gov't secrets. Hey, they government lies all the time...covers up...if you don't believe me, look at how they covered up the death of Pat Tillman.

Jack is a great semi-tragic, heroic figure. And more real than we would like to admit.

#8 — May 24, 2005 @ 01:47AM — Temple Stark [URL]

Yeah, that's the ticket .. just kidding here folks.

NO!!.

(At the risk of derailing the thread here - I agree with you about Pat Tillman. A rare example of a shameful propoganda cover-up of a very brave man. And despite what that ad up there says Tillman WAS an athiest)


See Arizona Central article "Tillmans family rips account by Army"

#9 — May 24, 2005 @ 02:09AM — Thomas Veil

I thought the eposide rocked and was very worthy of a season-ender. It was everything it ever promised to be for anyone who has watched every season: schmaltzy, over-the-top, American drama-adventure. If you were expecting Macbeth, you'd be disappointed.

That notwithstanding, kudos to the closing scene. I was hoping for a very "Nowhere Man" moment, with Jack walking knapsack on back down a desolate country road and the payoff was close enough to satisfy me. Thanks Joel Surnow! (wink)

#10 — May 24, 2005 @ 02:21AM — Temple Stark [URL]

You know what I forgot to mention in my post.

The episode would have been redeemed slightly if it had ended with Jack lying there .... dead? After all That 70s show is going to return without it' central and best characters.

Second: if President Palmer would have punched "President" "I take all the credit because boy I'm a card Logan hard, right in the face.


Palmer is going to feature big again in Day 5.

Tommy - as stated I've been watching the entire show from Day 1 (well, actually I missed the first couple of episodes now that I think about it, again) - no, I didn't expect Macbeth. Please.

#11 — May 24, 2005 @ 07:28AM — Paul Roy [URL]

I can picture the first episode of day 5 now....Jack will be on a deserted beach somewhere in Mexico, with long scruffy hair, a beard down to is knees, and a huge chip on his shoulder. As he is finishing off the last swig of a bottle of Jack Daniels a Blackhawk Helicopter lands on the beach and agents sent by President Palmer approach him with orders to report for duty. There is another crisis that only Jack can tackle. A few scenes later, Jack is cleanely shaven and we are off to the races.

#12 — May 24, 2005 @ 10:00AM — rohin [URL]

totally on board with you, temple. HORRIBLE.FINALE. considering how amazing the show was at its start this season, that makes me sad. and also, what happened to behrooz? and am i really supposed to believe that dina was killed off just like that? do the writers of the show really hold the viewers' intelligence in any kind of high regard?

i wonder what would've happened had 24 been a show on hbo and not fox...

#13 — May 24, 2005 @ 10:03AM — SFC SKI

Maybe it was a good way to leave room for another season without demanding one, or allowing Bauer to retire and let someone else take over.

#14 — May 24, 2005 @ 10:40AM — mike hollihan [URL]

I enjoyed the finale quite a bit. Not perfect, but it's episodic television, so I don't expect highly.

I wondered going in how they were going to handle all the balls they had in the air, all the loose threads still hanging. (President Keeler anyone?) My prediction was that they'd give us enough of a wrapup to be worthwhile, then punt to next season and pick up with the day after this season's today.

So, the end we got was a pleasant surprise.

Yeah, if you sit down and think too much, it starts to fall apart fast. So what? It's the modern day equivalent of the movie serials of the Forties. Perils of Pauline? Radar Men on the Moon? Batman? Bat Masterson?

Solution? Don't think too much! Enjoy.

Next season starts like Paul suggests: long-haired drunken bum Jack on the Mexican beach. Something crosses his path and he resists getting involved. But his Spider-sense tingles and he knows it's bad, so he has a dilemma: give up his shitty life and take back the burden of destiny, or grab another bottle. You guess which choice he makes.

All that said, the final minutes of the finale were so perfect it hurt. His best friend dumping him off on the edge of town (the tracks!). The terse, uncomfortable goodbye. Then, the lone man -- the disposable yet indispensible hero -- walks away. Life goes on for everyone else but him.

#15 — May 24, 2005 @ 10:45AM — Eric Olsen

we liked it quite a bit also, especially the first hour with Tony in jeopardy, the fate of the country hanging in the balance, etc etc. I think this was the best season overall, by far. Season 1 had a great first half then fizzled, this one was pretty taut and focused all the way through: nothing is perfect and there are always holes, but I thought it held together quite well and remained compelling

#16 — May 24, 2005 @ 11:04AM — Aaman [URL]

I was held tightely to my seat, and this feeling comingled with moments of absolute hilarity, especially the techie moments. Edgar and Cloey should form a stand-up comedy team.

Great show overall, except for the plotholes, which made it seem like it was written on the fly

#17 — May 24, 2005 @ 11:12AM — Eric Olsen

yes Aaman, I should have mentioned the sphincter-clench-factor, which was quite high and cannot be faked. Great call on Chloe and Edgar: socially-challenged, imperfect, hilarious, big hearts

#18 — May 24, 2005 @ 11:29AM — pencopal [URL]

The writers wrote a check they couldn't cash. What ever happened to Behrooz?

#19 — May 24, 2005 @ 11:32AM — Eric Olsen

I agree the lad was left in a quite unsatisfying limbo

#20 — May 24, 2005 @ 13:16PM — Temple Stark [URL]

>>Besides - acting, modeling, music style - the comparisons are there to be made.


Perfect. Wish I'd thought of that.

Mike H: I've given the same advice - don't think too much, enjoy.

And I have been enjoyinh. But this episode was terrible. Full of cliches which I guess is my biggest complaint and Paul Roy wants to see continue in Series 5. (Sadly I think that's exactly what will happen).

It's just a TV show. Did I mention it stank horribly? Maybe my expectations were too high - and nobody else thought the end of the nuke was a fizzled anti-climax?

#21 — May 24, 2005 @ 13:18PM — Temple Stark [URL]

Let's try that again (funny). Phrase I meant to copy:

>>The writers wrote a check they couldn't cash

Perfect, etc etc.

#22 — May 24, 2005 @ 13:19PM — Eric Olsen

yeah, the nuke-nuking was anti-climactic, but it's not about that, it's about the process

#23 — May 24, 2005 @ 13:23PM — Mark Sahm [URL]

You know, it seems like a lot of heavily hyped finales have been letting us down lately. Between Sith and 24, I think we've been too empowered in opinion by the grandness of previous editions that for the writers to make these finales even better than what we've already seen is near impossible to do.

I can only hope the finales for Lost and Alias this week fare better. But I'm not going to hold my breath.

#24 — May 24, 2005 @ 13:23PM — Brian

24....incredible, but still a TV show.

-It got annoying when a 1/2 hour was wasted when everyone on the show thought Tony was dead since every semi-intelligent viewer knew that it was the roomates who were posing.

-Won't the chinese gov't ask to see jack's body or some documentation of his death. I dont think they will take the word of the US.

*SIDE NOTE******** Look at President Logan and Bob Novak. Looks like G W Bush and Cheney to me. Cheney and Novak are exactly the same and if you remember when Logan heard that our 'football' was stolen and didnt do anything...reminds me of bush and 9/11. Something to think about...I think its definite.***********

#25 — May 24, 2005 @ 13:25PM — Eric Olsen

when catastrophe is finally averted in 24 it always seems anti-climactic, but in a sense this is more real because in real life it never ends with a huge climax: something always happens next

#26 — May 24, 2005 @ 13:27PM — Temple Stark [URL]

Logan looks mostly like Nixon. Quite a lot execpt a thiner face.

TV show as process? Bleeah. LOL

#27 — May 24, 2005 @ 13:28PM — Aaman [URL]

I seem to remember you called Logan a child-molester type earlier, T:)

Whatever happened to the half-dead President? Will he return, Frankenstein-like?

#28 — May 24, 2005 @ 13:39PM — Mark Sahm [URL]

I don't know why Behrooz is that important to anyone. It's not like they showed what happened to Andrew or the Indian nuke programmer or his girlfriend either after they were out of the focus.

Writing an end to Behrooz's storyline wouldn't have helped the finale though, other than to show he was alive.

Maybe a good solution could have been that he was on the street when the debris from the shot-down nuke fell. :)

#29 — May 24, 2005 @ 13:49PM — Temple Stark [URL]

I think i did Aaman.

Now that would be quite a plot twist - the president as a child molester.

Of course, to work it would have to be President David Palmer as a child molester because the audience likes him. Logan? There's no emotional investment there besides thinking he's a grade A, a-hole, child molester anyway.

But I'm sure he has his cuddly moments :-)

#30 — May 24, 2005 @ 14:35PM — mike hollihan [URL]

President Logan was definitely a lookalike for a young Nixon, with less cholic.

What about Jack Bauer pronouncing "nuclear" as nu-kyu-ler at the beginning of the show? There's something for all you Democratic conspiracy types.

Nobody has yet mentioned the biggest howler: You're a terrorist planner. You have many multiple layers of activity and terror going on across the country. You have to stay available and reachable, so you can coordinate it all. You elect to stay in one city until the very last moment, then make your escape.

So, what city do you point your coup de grace nuclear missile to? Shyeah....

Like others have noted, this was the season that kept its tensions running high right to the end. No slack periods. *Every* episode, for me, was white knuckle. If the trade-off is a bit more unbelievability, then I'll take it.

With Naked Mandy in custody, will we now learn what was up with her and the handshake of death? I've heard talk that hints of next season have been dropped into this season. Is her arrest part of that?

#31 — May 28, 2005 @ 18:49PM — datone

This season began really good. I mean really, really good. The first 12 hours that is. Then it turned into a much less interesting TV show but I hoped that by the end they will come up with something to make up for making us watch those limey episodes. Unfortunately it didn't. What were the writers thinking!? Even I could have come up with a better plot!

I was hoping they would turn Heller's son into a environmentalist who was in it for shutting down all the nuclear plants in US, manipulated same as Marwan, by greedy energy conglomerate who want the same thing just so they could sell more of their 'alternative stuff'! Or to be absolutely honest - anything else, just not so damn predictable and plain. Too many presidential pardons, too many revivals from death and far too little unpredictability. It was the worst ... disappointment ... ever

#32 — January 15, 2006 @ 23:43PM — Temple Stark [URL]

Anyone can feel free to fix my typos in this post.

Brrrrr.

Interesting to read the comments a few months removed.

#33 — May 23, 2006 @ 09:33AM — Julie J

I enjoyed most of it. I'm glad that Turkey Neck President finally got his. But when Jack kissed his girlfriend and got a call from "his daughter"....everything seemed to be going too well. I knew when he went into get that call that something bad was going to happen to him. Oh well...guess everyone we will have to wait until Jan 07 to see what becomes of ol' Jackie boy.

#34 — May 23, 2006 @ 10:56AM — Temple Stark [URL]

The post here refers to last season (see 5-24-2005 date) and is the biggest reason why I didn't watch this season except for the first episode.

#35 — May 22, 2007 @ 15:20PM — dumbass hater

The creator of this post is a dumbass as well as most people that replied. You are all a drain on society.

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