Flipping through channels at my mother's house yesterday, I came upon the Sci-Fi Channel's presentation of Junior. I've never seen the movie nor do I really plan to, but I appreciated its being scheduled on mother's day. There are plenty of appropriate films to watch with your mom on this Hallmark holiday and this is not one of them. If I had been alone, though, I felt there fewer more fitting for a man to watch. Maybe on that list is also Mr. Mom, Three Men and a Baby and any of those other single-man-with-baby formulas, but really those make more sense for father's day next month.

The concept of Junior suits me a little better -and this isn't weird because I do not want to be a pregant man nor do I want to be a woman -with my honest admittance of womb envy. Not as recognized as the reciprocal penis envy, womb envy relates to the feeling of inadequate human experience. No matter what I do or don't do with my life, getting pregnant and giving birth will never even be an option. Some women who aren't mothers might think the concept insane because of the pain involved, but I bet a lot of those who have been through it can understand the jealousy. Being a mother is obviously a much bigger thing than being a father.

Take a solipsistically paranoid view on the matter. Suppose that you saw a few too many Philip K. Dick adaptations (Blade Runner was also on TV this afternoon) and felt that everyone you know is a robot or a figment of your imagination or part of "The Matrix". The only thing close enough to experiencing another being's existence would have to be birthing that being. Sure, maybe that baby growing inside of you is a symbiotic creature (like in Alien) not truly created of you, but otherwise you will have a greater trust that your child is as real as yourself. "I birth therefore he is," becomes the analagous philosophical statement.

Anyway, happy belated mother's day from the Film Cynic!