''Capping a two-week brouhaha over Microsoft's fluid position on a state gay-rights bill, Chief Executive Steve Ballmer yesterday reversed course and said the company will support the legislation in the future.'' from: Microsoft decides to back gay-rights bill.

Speaking through a spokesperson, Saint Isidore of Seville (patron saint of computers and computer users), God announced that due to recent actions by the Microsoft Corporation to support the rights of their workers, he would no longer be issuing Christianity on Windows. The next full release of Christianity will only be running on Linux.

Several born-again Christian groups agreed (although they mentioned they didn't recognize the standing of Saint Isidore or other such Papist tripe). Many people cited this reported passage from a new 2.0 version of the Bible, mysteriously (as in an Act of God) leaked to the press:

''And God created the Open Source Programming Community, and it was good. Satan retaliated with its evil twin, Windows and thus the battle for good and evil was joined'' (Torvald 2:17)

More developments are expected as the new release date approaches...

Big Time Patriot