Only with oven mittens, Britney.

Britney Spears and husband Kevin Federline have announced the name of their upcoming reality show, Britney and Kevin: Chaotic, which premieres with a special one-hour episode on Tuesday, May 17 at 9PM ET/PT, on UPN.

Is the show an exploration of chaos theory, the "butterfly effect," the disorder of formless matter in infinite space? Not the way they are announcing it anyway. The couple, who announced last month that they are expecting a small Spears-Federline in the proximate future, say the six-episode series is about "their personal love story though exclusive, never-before-seen private home videos they shot themselves during their courtship, engagement and wedding."

UPN adds, "This fun, uniquely personal series, shot mostly by Britney and Kevin with their own camera, will give viewers a rare glimpse inside the couple's relationship and life together. The footage begins shortly after Britney and Kevin first met in Los Angeles and headed off to Europe together on tour, leading up to and including their wedding day. UPN is also shooting new footage and commentary with Britney and Kevin that will guide viewers through their story."

Nothing about mathematics or metaphysics at all, it would appear. "Can you handle our truth?" they ask saucily.

Click on the banner to see a chaotic preview clip of the show, some of it shot in "greenvision," made infamous by Paris Hilton and that guy.

And speaking of Britney's delicate condition, her alleged pregnancy test has been sold by a Canadian radio station to Internet gambling site GoldenPalace.com. Ottawa's radio station The New Hot 89.9 scored the pregnancy test from a "connection" at the Los Angeles hotel where Spears and Federline were staying a couple of months ago. The positive test was found in the trash can of the happy couple's bathroom then sold to the station's "Morning Hot Tub" show. Proceeds from the sale will reportedly go to charity.

I would certainly hope so.

Tangentially, guitar hero and veteran singer-songwriter Richard Thompson announced that he covers "Oops! ... I Did it Again" on an upcoming live CD and DVD called 1000 Years of Popular Music, the set list of which ranges from a 13th-century Italian ballad to Hank Williams to Britney.