This is an unusual book, combining memoir with theology. Both authors contribute their life stories, which for the most part do not intersect. The authors argue that the traditional Western Christian focus on Jesus' suffering on the cross has resulted in a too easy acceptance of suffering, and in particular, has encouraged women to remain in abusive relationships.

Parker relates the story of Anola Reed, who was counseled by a a fellow Methodist minister, who tried to help her escape from an abusive relationship. Instead, Reed remained with her husband, considering it her religious duty to keep the family together. Eventually, her husband killed her. Parker then writes of a woman she herself counseled, named Lucia. She had been repeatedly beaten by her husband, and had years before been told by a priest, "If you love Jesus, accept the beatings and bear them gladly, as Jesus bore the cross." Parker told Lucia that she need not accept her husband's beatings. Lucia left her husband.

Brock was born in Japan, of a Japanese mother and American GI father. She grew up in Kansas as a Christian, though she was aware of Buddhist relatives. When Brock's mother left for the United States with her husband, Brock's grandfather said to her, "In his country, people are Christians. Your family want you to know that, if you decide to become a Christian, it will be all right. We will still love you, and you will still be our daughter." Would that Judaism, Christianity and Islam had such a liberal attitude. I'm afraid, however, that the dominant position of the three Abrahamic religions in the world is in part based on their intolerance of out-conversion.

Brock grew up with a Christianity that was dour and pious, until she became close to a family who put fun into fundamentalism. They never convinced her, however, of the literal truth of the Bible and creationism, and it being the 1960's, she opted for a version of Christianity which emphasized social justice. I can relate to this experience myself, as my own Orthodox Jewish background was mostly a serious of don'ts--"don't eat unkosher, don't ride on the Sabbath" until I met Hasidic Jews who combined a number of spiritual do's with the don'ts. They even convinced me of creationism for a while, before I broke away from them.

Parker discusses controversial episodes in her ministry, such as the split when her church decided to publically welcome gays, and a quarter of the members resigned. Parker is extremely revealing about painful episodes. She writes of being sexually abuse as a child by a neighbor. She writes of aborting the only child she would have had under pressure from a husband who changed his mind about having children. He threatened to leave her if she kept the pregnancy. Not surprisingly, the marriage failed anyway. She went to Seattle's Lake Union at night to drown herself, but happened upon a club of amateur astronomers who had set up their telescopes at lakeside. She ended up viewing Jupiter and going home.