The Konks - The Konks; BBQ - Tie Your Noose

Written by bmarkey
Published March 12, 2005
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Straddling the divide between garage rock and punk like a snot-nosed colossus is The Konks' self-titled album. As they proudly proclaim in "29 Fingers", they play "cheap guitars and only two lousy drums", yet the noise they make with those meager instruments is a righteously primordial one.

Had there been garages and electric guitars back in Neolithic times, The Konks would surely have been top of the pops. (Work with me, OK?) This band aspires to lo-fi status, and achieves it nicely. Bob's guitar solos (all Konks go by their first names) on opening track "Outta My Mind" (not to be confused with "Out Of My Mind" - that's track 7) and the aforementioned "29 Fingers" sound as if someone were very slowly dragging the tonearm across a Sonics album. (Kids, go ask your parents what that would have sounded like.)

Drummer/vocalist Kurt sounds more and more like the late lamented Bon Scott over the course of the disc - especially on the greasy cover of Aerosmith's "Let The Music Do The Talking" that wraps things up - with some wild primate grunts and screams thrown in for good measure. And when Jon's bass surfaces in the mix, it's not just plodding along. He's working that plank.

Thematically, The Konks are all about thwarted lust. Then again, that sorta goes without saying, as thwarted lust is one of the hallmarks of the genre. That and boasting about what a badass you are, which gets covered in "29 Fingers":

"We got 29 fingers and man we're havin' fun
29 fingers and boy, we're havin' fun
29 fingers - only six of them are thumbs

We play cheap guitars and just two lousy drums
Cheap guitars and just two lousy drums
If you see us comin', you better get out of the way
'Cause we're The Konks, yeah yeah yeah yeah
Yeah, we're The Konks and we don't care"

So badass are these Konks that they can abandon a rhyme scheme in the middle of a verse! Also, they seem to be short a finger, unless my math is off. Another sign of bad-assedness, to be sure. At any rate, it's a quality listen.

The Konks may be working without much in the way of equipment, but compared to our next artist they've got enough gear for the New York Philharmonic. BBQ, aka Mark Sultan of Les Sexareenos, is here to say that less really is more. One man, one guitar, a kick drum, a snare set up with a pedal, and a tambourine. (I'm assuming 10 fingers, but we all know what happens when one assumes.) No multi-tracking, everything recorded live and lo-fi. Doesn't get much more minimal than that, does it?

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The Konks - The Konks; BBQ - Tie Your Noose
Published: March 12, 2005
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Section: Music
Filed Under: Music: Alternative Rock, Music: Classic Rock and Oldies, Music: Hard Rock, Music: Indie Rock, Music: Punk Rock, Music: Rock
Writer: bmarkey
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Comments

#1 — March 12, 2005 @ 10:43AM — wally bangs [URL]

The Konks album is in heavy rotation at the Wally household. "29 Fingers" is garage hall of fame material. BBQ may not be Hasil Adkins, but he's also fun. Keep the great writing coming bmarkey.

#2 — March 12, 2005 @ 11:03AM — Aaron, Duke De Mondo [URL]

excellent bmarkey. thouroughly enjoyed that right there, man.

#3 — March 17, 2005 @ 11:17AM — Temple Stark [URL]

bmark,

I enjoyed reading that. I got so excited I went out and bought a bed. I get to sleep on a Queen every night now.

Also, I launched this on the world - or at least the part of the world that scours Advance.net for the (family-friendly) cream of the BC Web log.

Here's the link. Sorry here.

- Thanks. Temple

#4 — March 17, 2005 @ 14:03PM — bmarkey [URL]

Hey, congrats on the upgrade, Temple. A good night's sleep is key in the quest for fun. Unless, y'know, the fun is what's keeping you up.

Thanks for the link. I guess those royalty checks will come rolling in any time now, right? :)

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