The Duke On "Double Indemnity"
Published March 03, 2005
That Little Billy Morocco ain't fit to wipe the shit from off of Billy Wilder's knuckles, Keyes.
Anyhow, shut your filthy face for ten minutes, how about? What I'm getting at is something along the lines of this kinda shit right here;
Some times in the middle of the night a man gets to thinking. What if, Keyes, what if this, what if that. What if a man just decided to throw good sense and conscience to the wind and do something no jury in the land would stand for, just for to get it on with a broad with a really rather bizarre hair-style? What if he said "Fuck it up the fucking hole, baby, I'm gonna kill your husband stone cold dead so as we can collect the life insurance and take our pretty little hides cross the border to Mexico or Holland or wherever it is we live next to. Damn it, honey, I can't look at that weird hair of yours for a second longer without wanting to fling a motherfucker off of a train. I want you to push that hair down my throat and let me piss it onto your head afresh. That's the kinda thoughts I'm thinking baby."
You disgust me, Keyes.
Well I don't know if you know or not, but that's the kinda shit these cats get up to in this Billy Wilder flick by the name of Double Indemnity. This gal Phyllis, she's a looker, see, even though she's got this rather disturbing hair-style that a man can't help but stare at. What's up with that hair, you'd want to ask her, but you wouldn't, cause you're a polite kinda bastard, Keyes, that's why the ladies let you pop them for free sometimes.
I gotta tell you, Keyes. Sitting here, in this office, spilling my shitty guts all over this tape-recorder thing, I can't help but wonder. I wah-wah-wah-wah-wonder, Keyes. What if I'd just said no? What if I'd said "Ladies, I don't care what you say, and I respect your right to vote in a democratic society, but damn it baby, if I put on this film by the name of Double Indemnity, chances are you'll just disappear into the fabric of time, or at least leave unsatisfied. Maybe I'll wake up tomorrow morning with a heavy head and a toilet-full of bile-laced regret. Maybe I'll think about how I shoulda done you one more time just for old time's sake. But I doubt it."
Because I gotta say, Keyes, chances are the only thing I'll be thinking is something along the lines of "Holy shit, what a fucking incredible motion-flick that Double Indemnity was."
The Duke (Aaron McMullan to his parents and the clergy) is a Northern Irish writer, performer and insomniac currently residing in London. He is the creator of Mondo Irlando, wherein his scribblings and hollerings can be found. He is currently working towards the completion of his first novel, and his debut "punk / country / folk / whatever" album has recently been released by Ex Libris Records . You can also pop by His MySpace Page and maybe have a coffee and a biscuit.
- The Duke On "Double Indemnity"
- Published: March 03, 2005
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- Section: Video
- Filed Under: Video: Thriller, Video: Suspense and Mystery, Video: Crime, Video: Classics
- Writer: Duke De Mondo
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- Duke De Mondo's personal site
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Comments on this articleComments
Glad to see your going through the classics, Duke. And with the style a mofo like me can only dream of.
ROTFL!
Jesus...(wipes tears from eyes...) you're the master, Duke. I love you, man.
Not in a motherfucking faggotly-assed way, either...
As you can tell from the link, this movie is out of print. In fact, I called the video store just the other day and they told me the same thing -- that the only way to get a copy is to buy it used. I prefer to wait for a fabulous re-issue package; one is definitely in order. This movie just defines film noir, and I love seeing Barbara Stanwyck shopping in her sunglasses; it just looks so weird.
If there is indeed a reissue, I wonder if the original ending is still in existence and would be added as an extra to the package. The original ending featured Edward G. Robinson watching Fred MacMurray's execution.
hey folks
glad you found this critique de cinema to be enlightening and so on. First off, with regards the DVD, at this page right here;
http://www.mondoirlando.com/double_indemnity.html
on my own site, i link to the REGION 2 DVD, which i thought was already out, but turns out it's not, it's being released this april. Hopefully it'll have an abundance of extras, the lieks of that alternate ending discussed up above, for example. Even if it's got nothing, though, it'll still be a must-own.
HW, i didn't know the sordid details of Chandler's part in it all (although i knew he co-wrote). there's something really rather disgusting about that whole set-up.
I bought my copy of the out of print Double Indemnity on evay for (gulp) $45.00. I don't feel any remorse. Even when it becomes worthless after an inevitable reissue.
I will not go into the greatness of "Double Indemnity" nor Duke's unique examination of said film. I will say that "Creepshow 2" is an excellent horror film, and the final segment dealing with the hitchhiker is one of the best such segments ever put on film. I am a member of the "Creepshow 2" cult, and we recite lines from that segment. The power of Lois Chiles reigns supreme. You folks may wax poetic about Barbara's sunglassed stroll through a 40s supermarket. I say partake in the power of Lois Chiles' greatness. Drink from her cup. Fred MacMurray you say? BAH! Give me the undead hitchhiker any day of the week.
matt, i know how these things go. Sometimes a man needs to fork out for whats worth forking out for. ie, i recently purchased several hard-to-find Kirsten Dunst pictures from off of such an auction site. Some may fling scorn at us, scornfully. Sod them. We know some things are worth more than money, limbs and so on.
dbcooper, i am awed by your reverence for this most wonderful of sequels. And what of Tom Savini's performance? flinging that cape around him like there's no tomorow. Do you have the wonderful Anchor Bay dvd? i presume it's available in the US, it's just been issued here in the United UK. Wonderful.
Don't fuck with Wood'n Head, i would advise.
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This has always been one of my favorite
Billy Wilder directed movies,"Stalag 17"
being the all time fave.You can't beat
those German bastards when it comes to
the visual aesthetics.
You were fully in appreciation of this
film's dialogue and I don't blame you at
all. It was done largely by Mr. Raymond
Chandler who was on a major drunk at the
time of writing this. He had full help
from the studio to pull this off. Being
fully aware of big Ray's penchant for
drink, the studio watched out for him &
shuttled him back and forth from home to
studio in a limo. He wrote great stuff
while drunk and the studio execs knew
this.Rather than trying to stop him they
found it easier to put him on a sort of
"controlled" drunk so he could knock
this screenplay off.It worked like mad,
although giving Chandler(a raving lush)
his booze was about like giving Krispy
Kreme doughnuts to diabetics. Chandler
also has an un-credited,non-spoken cameo
in the film.
One of the many great things that make
this film really stand out to me is the
out of character casting of MacMurray as
a slimeball and Barbara Stanwyck as the
femme fatale. Both pull off their parts
with ease and aplomb. Genius film.