The choice to stay in the cocoon is almost always in the hands of the subject, not the third or second party trying so hard to control the situation to get their desired outcome. That person will say and do anything to keep you there in that cocoon. It is manipulation at it's finest or ugliest, depending on your point of view, but either way, it's not the way things will naturally want to be.

One cannot stop the metamorphosis forever, or they can, but only if you let them out of some sense of duty or guilt or fear of whatever. One must believe just as Charlotte eventually does, and as Lolita, though sadly, Lolita was damaged too young to ever recover fully from her father's manipulation and her own fear and inhibitions. Remember what Nabokov said about his nymphets, that in the midst of others "she stands unrecognized by them and unconscious of her fantastic power."