Scene: Morning — a newly-thirtysomething checks her RSS feeds. She takes a sip of coffee and nearly spews it all over her laptop. She shakes her fist, and growls in a somewhat pirate-like fashion. The color in her face drains completely. As she looks to the sky, she exclaims "WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?!?"

A Virginia state representative, John Cosgrove, has introduced legislation that would require women to report all miscarriages within 12 hours. ALL miscarriages...within TWELVE hours. Does he even know how common miscarriages are in the first trimester, let alone the first few weeks?

(I don't even have to Google this guy, I can tell you exactly what he looks like. Smug. Old boy. I like to kick back a few bourbons and yell at my wife, but then I ask Jesus to forgive me. You know the type. Let's check and see if I'm right. Oh, bingo! Spot on.)

Do you really want some Alabama-born community college graduate telling you what to do in the event you unintentionally lose a pregnancy? I'm going with a "no" on that one. No one should be telling you what to do in that situation other than your doctor, and your conscience. Community college, Ivy League, black, white, gay, straight, male, female...y'all can just stay out of my pants, thanks.

(Unless you're Jude Law... in which case, come on in).

Here's the bill itself, and here's a well-written post from a Virginian positing what might happen in the event this piece of overreaching legislative idiocy gets passed. (You thought Tom DeLay blaming the tsunami on a lack of the Christian faith in Southeast Asia was dumb? Well, it just keeps getting worse, doesn't it?)

What can possibly be gained from this bill other than spilling another jug of (Halliburton-extracted) oil on the slippery slope towards banning abortion?

I'm not saying we shouldn't investigate unaccounted-for deaths. When the local police find a baby some teenager gave birth to at the prom, then ditched in the school bathroom trashcan, it's one thing. Something sketchy happened, and they should look into it. But imagine a woman who's been trying to get pregnant for years. She keeps having miscarriages for one medical reason or another. You're going to put her through repeat police interviews? Have the neighbors wondering if she's a menace to society every time the patrol car shows up? Invade her privacy because she can't seem to carry a child to term? Someone made a comment on Metafilter about surrounding tampons with crime scene tape - give us a few more years of these kind of legislative yahoos and that's what you'll get.