Tom Hanks - Da Vinci Code Shocker!
Published December 07, 2004
Hey folks.
What I love, is when spam emails up the ante somewhat, and strive to offer a bit of the old "entertainment" alongside the offers of CHEAP FUCKING DRUGS WHAT'LL COKE YOUR EYES OUT - NON-PRESCRIPTION - 92% LEGAL AND NO DOCTOR.
It makes a man happy when there's something arresting amidst news of my penile inadequacy.
HA HA DUKE YOUR KNOB IS TINY AND SILLY-LOOKING IN CERTAIN LIGHT BUT I CAN HELP BY THIS HERE THING THAT DOES SOMETHING OR OTHER (NOTE - MAY DO FUCK ALL) CHEERS TINY-DICK
So what happened is I opened the email box (it's a box that holds all the emails. Some folks have it on the computer. Maybe yours is under the car) and found the following devastating piece of information.
Maybe these folks read some of The Duke's philosophical musings on "motherfuck" and such, maybe they just loved my review of SS Experiment Camp, but whatever the reason, they know I alone and also millions of others can help bring this here development to a close.
It turns out that some book about a loada bullshit is being made into a Hollywood epic, and it's all on account of Tom Hanks or something.
To be honest, from what these folks are telling me about the plot, I think I'd quicker scribble up an email to Martin Scorsese, Paul Schrader and Nikos Kazantzakis announcing the plagiarism going on here. It's basically Last Temptation Of Christ, far as I can see, with some added Tom Hanks.
Anyway, here's the email, except I've taken out the address for Tom Hanks, since who knows?
-----------------------------
Are you aware of the following?
Tom Hanks is in talks to star in the movie version of "The Da Vinci Code." You can do something about this. Send Tom Hanks a message (see below).
"The Da Vinci Code" promotes the following claims:
- Jesus is not God; he was only a man.
- Jesus was married to Mary Magdalene.
- Mary Magdalene is a goddess and should be worshipped.
- Jesus and Mary Magdalene had a daughter.
- The Bible was put together by a pagan Roman emperor.
- The Gospels have been altered to support the claims of Christians.
- Mary Magdalene was directed to establish the Church.
- The Catholic Church is aware of all of these things and, in order to keep it secret, has resorted to murder.
- Tom Hanks - Da Vinci Code Shocker!
- Published: December 07, 2004
- Type:
- Section: Video
- Filed Under: Video: Drama, Video: Fantasy, Video: News
- Writer: Duke De Mondo
- Duke De Mondo's BC Writer page
- Duke De Mondo's personal site
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Comments
Personally I liked the book. I also read Angles and Demons and enjoyed it. I look foward to seeing the movie...and reading Dan Browns next
Wait wait wait wait! Back up Duke! You've got access to drugs that will coke my eyes out? Dude, you gotta hook me up. I mean, I am even on your private yahoo group and you are holdin?
Man, I'll trade you some of your mind blowin' coke for all these penis pumps I ordered. Apparently everyone in the online world knows I have a small dick and bad credit. That's why I do drugs from online companies, it helps me forget about my first two problems.
oh yeah, don't be dissin' Forrest Gump either... or I'll carve you a whole nother Van Gogh code art boy!
praise the Duke!
lono
I thought the book was a pleasant diversion - just a time filler of little literary value, so I don't know why everyone's shorts are in a knot over it. I think I've mentioned on blogcritics before that Umberto Eco's Foucault's Pendulum (sp?) was better, deeper and funnier too. FP pretty much ties all conspiracy theories together and then dismisses them. I wish it could dismiss all this ruckus over Dan Brown's book - isn't this just the "Harry Potter is evil" campaign all over again?
im just wondering, iv heard rummors that tom hanks is a aston villa fan, and most of the clubs fans, would like 2 no if he would buy the club off our chairman doug ellis? doug is killing the club and if hanks bought it, it wood b a gr8 investment, football can get u lots of money, does ene1 no how 2 contact him, e-mail me plz!?!
Good morning!
I recently finished reading Angels & Demons followed by the Da Vinci Code. Loved them both. Towards the end of the Code, I found out that Tom Hanks was to play Robert Langdon. My heart sunk. he soooo does not fit the image created by Dan Brown.
I fully believe Hanks is a terrific actor; no doubt about it. However, he's just over-exposed now. Give other actors a chance. I think we've seen enough of Hanks and the other Tom to last us for quite awhile. I'm surprised at the casting agents. The story and controversy are enough to ensure a blockbuster.
I've read a few other blogs on the web and people seem to feel the same way. A great idea would be to have it as a mini-series on PBS or even HBO. There is so much information that making it fit into even a 3 hour movie seems "forced."
We need understated actors who are brilliant and don't overwhelm the marquee. I propose a re-casting of the lead role. After debating it with a friend, we came to the conclusion that there are 2 very good options for Langdon. Either Gary Sinise or Edward Norton.
I do agree that Audrey Tatou would mesh as Sophie Neveu and of course Jean Reno makes a perfect Bezu Fache.
So anyone want to start a petition to send to Ron Howard? I'm sure Mr. Hanks has s atke in the production at least. Fine. But step out of the limelight this time. Please.
The third time someone gushed at me about The Da Vinci code, my memory crystallized around a book I had read decades ago, Holy Blood, Holy Grail. Quoting the Amazon paperback editorial review:
Michael Baigent, Henry Lincoln, and Richard Leigh, authors of The Messianic Legacy, spent over 10 years on their own kind of quest for the Holy Grail, into the secretive history of early France. What they found, researched with the tenacity and attention to detail that befits any great quest, is a tangled and intricate story of politics and faith that reads like a mystery novel. It is the story of the Knights Templar, and a behind-the-scenes society called the Prieure de Sion, and its involvement in reinstating descendants of the Merovingian bloodline into political power. Why? The authors of Holy Blood, Holy Grail assert that their explorations into early history ultimately reveal that Jesus may not have died on the cross, but lived to marry and father children whose bloodline continues today. The authors' point here is not to compromise or to demean Jesus, but to offer another, more complete perspective of Jesus as God's incarnation in man...
dr. pat, i read in this months fortean times something along the lines of the authors of holy blood, holy grail embarking on a legal venture on account of how much Brown has apparently "liberated" from their text (i have yet to read either books, so can't comment, although did purchase a paperback of DVC if only to ensure that 90% of the last two months worth of various magazines isn't wasted. Every damn fool wants to yack about it, it seems)
the fortean times editor said something along the lines of how it was interesting what happened, since HB,HG is presented as an "alternative history" type affair, but that such a legal action would be akin to saying i made it up. you can't copywrite history, like.
Well I love Tom Hanks for one that's why i was quite dissappointed when i read that he gets to play in that film Da Vinci Code. I know my faith and its probably the most glorious thing to have in this world that is the faith that Jesus is the Christ and my savior. Things like that Dan Brown book can't do anything to confused that. I mean hey hello come on. Its just a pity that such sacred things be dragged to be use in personal agendas which i have no idea what, to create controversy? Earn money? be famous? whatever. Whoever the director maybe should ensure that the script, the plot and everything else in that movie is worth watching. Well for Tom Hanks he must ensure that he'll get Oscar best actor in playing whatever role. Co'z if not, my dear, the movie will never be worth spending a dime.
I didn't read the book or watch the movie yet, but I do know and believe that Jesus is a unique person but not a god... Jesus is God's messenger not His son... and this's the truth...
When I read the book or watch the movie I'll be back to write something which (I guess) no one will ever read 'cause almost everyone only like writing but not reading...
By the way, I don't think Tom Hanks will ever care 'bout we people are writing over here 'cause (I guess) he has no time for us and he'll never reply to us...
Sorry for this... but it IS reality... Tom Hanks is a STAR... and we are NOT stars, so he won't care about US...
Nano, you should check into the Books section here to see how many do, in fact, read as well as write.
One reason for the wild success of The Da Vinci Code is that the message of God-become-man resonates in more than just the Christian religion.
well cripes Nano, you make it sound as if Tom Hanks is like letting us down or dissing us here at BC.
Anyway, I think whomever made the point about having Faith, it's valid. If a person has Faith, than no Code, or Harry Potter, should make a difference.
So, Duke, you getting such spam,eh? I usually get the one's for vicoden or refinancing my mortgage. Of course, yesterday I did get one of those please from the really rich foreign person, who has all this money that they need to like give away, or something crazy like that.
So, off to go listen to one of my fav U2 songs on the radio. : )
My French Frog secret admirer/#1 fan is in this film.
That is all.
After reading the Da Vinci Code I thought Jason Robards would be perfect for the lead role of Robert Langdon, but then realized he had died. I figured, "Well, let's cast Klaus Kinski instead." Then uncomfortably realized he was dead too.....
Anyone interested in the truth behind Dan Brown's work should check out the documentary Secrets of Angels, Demons & Masons which can be found here - http://www.angelsdemonsmasons.com/
what do you expect? after all, it was written by some godamn stupid fuck from new hampster.
I,m very disappointed in Tom for staring in the blasphmus film.....Even being remotely assoiated with it will be a big negative for him.


The Duke (Aaron McMullan to his parents and the clergy) is a Northern Irish writer, performer and insomniac currently residing in London. He is the creator of 




time check is all