What anagrams teach us about this election

Written by Jeremy Chrysler
Published November 03, 2004

There is truth in anagrams dear friends, and we would be neglectful bloggers not to to open our eyes to it.

An anagramical dissection of "early exit polls" may indeed reveal what went wrong. Perhaps we should have "let a sex pillory" get more involved in the process. Maybe the Kerry campers were a part of the "Italy loserplex". Who knows? Maybe they are urging the overseas voters to contest the election, saying, "Lo, Sir expat, yell!"

What can we say about "John Forbes Kerry", whom his wife calls "her fry joker snob", affectionately of course. She also saves kind words for Kerry's running mate, whom she calls "jerky boner frosh", at least until he serves a second term in the Senate at some point in the future.

While I do believe the the headlines will ultimately read "Bush Wins Ohio", if he hadn't won, I'm betting that some republicans would have been saying "I unwish hobos", particularly since his advisors were advising that he capture the criminal vote, saying, "Hi Bush, woo sin".

There is bound to be controversy surrounding the "touchscreen voting" once America discovers all the problems that occurred due to "conceiver thug snot". However, the ladies at Victoria's Secret did seem to take to them quite fondly, in a political phenomenon soon to be known as the "coercive thong stun". This occurred because, in my opinion, the Democrats should never have never issued the command to "Go, hunt not crevices". I guess you live and you learn.

In a response on his website, "big Mike Moore" gave his opinion on the election and validated a popular theory among conservative operatives by saying, with very poor, but understandable spelling, "I'm ok, mi be ogre." Muddying the waters, he later said "Gimme, I broke". Who knows?

If indeed, the "youth vote for kerry", we could be waiting for another 28 hours as they say to "evoke forty hour try". Disenfranchised convicted escorts from Cleveland cooly responded to the new youth voters, "try hooker vote fury!"

At the end of the day, all I could say was that the "big voter turnout" made the difference. Can we "tout big-turn Rove" for this? Probably. But if the election isn't officially decided soon, I know that many people will throw up their hands with "grit voter burnout."

One thing we know about "George Bush", and that's that "he bugs Gore". He probably got that from his dad, "George Herbert Walker Bush", whom Mike Morton and the Anagrams call the "huge berserk rebel warthog".

Hopefully it will be, as John Kerry might wax in French, "over sans odor", at least if "Soros and Rove" have anything to say about it...

love it, hate it, there's more of it at Pacetown.

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What anagrams teach us about this election
Published: November 03, 2004
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Section: Politics
Writer: Jeremy Chrysler
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#1 — November 3, 2004 @ 11:42AM — SFC SKI

Thanks, I needed that.

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