OPINION

Europe to America: Suck My Ass!

Written by Rodney Welch
Published September 30, 2004

Some years ago, I wrote a feature story for the Camden, S.C. Chronicle-independent about a group of foreign exchange students visiting Camden, and it kicked up a small storm.

The students had been nursed from birth with this idea that that they were inherently superior to this country of vulgarians which they had apparently been sentenced to visit. People here ate with their fingers, for God's sake; they saluted the flag — which, a German kid actually had the King Kong-sized balls to lecture me, people in his advanced country associated with the Nazis — they go to church (the German kid, again, pointed out that most people in his country don't make such an extravagant display of religious faith, provided they have any) and, worst of all, people in this country smile and say hello even to complete strangers, the very epitome of insincerity.

The standard line, repeated ad nauseum, was that they knew about our country but we knew nothing about theirs. These little pronouncements were all met with the approvingly smug nod of a host parent, a loud, garish, overweight hairdresser who — appearances to the contrary — seemed anxious to demonstrate that she wasn't an ugly American. Whenever I pressed a student on any point, she jumped in to explain his point for him, usually with double the smugness.

The hour or so I spent in the company of these kids brought out my own arrogance, although I held it in check. Why should we know about your country, I wanted to say. The reason you know about us is because you live in our shadow, not the other way around; what we do in this country affects you and what you do back home in Grevenmacher or Prague or Brussels or wherever you hail from just doesn't account for one whole hell of a lot.

On the other hand, they did have an advantage in that they were here and I'd never been to Europe in my life; hell, I've barely been out of the South. Maybe they knew something I didn't. I like to think of myself as something of a non-citizen of the world, not unlike Mason O'Leary in Anne Tyler's The Accidental Tourist, who wrote travel books for stay-at-home types who find themselves in the unfortunate situation of having to actually go somewhere. So I suppose I have to contend with the fact that I'm very limited in how far I can see this country with a foreign point of view — which, ever since President Dumbass wandered into Iraq, seems to be the one with the most currency. Improving the world's low opinion of America is a central theme of Kerry's presidential campaign for the presidency, or it will be if he can ever shake the Swift Boat Veterans for Slander off his ass.

"Foreigners can see things about America that natives cannot," says Mark Hertsgaard in his book The Eagle's Shadow: Why America Fascinates and Infuriates the World " ...Americans can learn from their perceptions, if we choose to."

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Europe to America: Suck My Ass!
Published: September 30, 2004
Type: Opinion
Section: Culture
Filed Under: Video: Foreign Language, Video: Art House, Books: Literature and Fiction, Books: History, Books: Arts
Writer: Rodney Welch
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Comments

#1 — September 30, 2004 @ 21:33PM — Jim Carruthers [URL]

Bruce Bawer, if that is the article I recall, portrays all of Europe based on his experience in one city in Norway, which is like making a portrait of the States like one extended stay in a single USA city, say, St. Louis, Detroit, Tampa or Charleston SC. And watching a teevee show starring Donald Trump.

Maybe the reason he had a bad experience in Norway isn't because he is from the USA, but because he might be a prick.

#2 — October 1, 2004 @ 00:07AM — Mike Kole [URL]

Part of the problem with European understanding of Americans is that they get so damned much American TV to look at. Last week in Copenhagen, I could watch CNN, Law & Order, and Everyone Loves Raymond at will. I was seeing as much coverage of the US Presidential campaign as the announcement of the intent of the Danish prince and princess to divorce. They see our TV shows and believe it represents as real in too many unfortunate ways, which I guess is more or less what Bawer says.

I was very amused at their take on typical American political beliefs. When I told the Danes that I am a libertarian, I was made to explain what that meant. I tried to keep it very simple, explaining that I believe that government is too large and intrusive, and that taxes are too high. The inevitable response? "But that's what all Americans believe!" They really believe that the US is an anarchic Coliseum of social Darwinism on parade, and that an American liberal Democrat is closer to Milton Friedman than to a European social democrat, which is actually the case.

#3 — April 10, 2006 @ 23:11PM — Derek Todd

The Europeans that constantly want to degrade the United States are so full of jealousy towards us that they cant stand it. They just want to make themselves feel better because they are not part of the greatest country in the world. After Europes demise and the rise of the greatest economic and military power in the world, who could blame them. They all wish that the country they live in could be the same. They all really need to understand that the United States is the best thing that could happen to them with respect to the security of there countries. Deep down inside they all know that we are the defenders of the western way of life and without us the socialists in Europe would be hard pressed to find someone to defend our western culture. God bless those in Europe which understand the important role the United States plays in world affairs and God bless the United Kingdom for its political support always. Hey Europe, who freed you from facism and the onslaught of the Soviet Union? Could you really have held them off without us?

#4 — April 14, 2006 @ 19:54PM — scott armstrong

the reason people hate americans is that y'all so opinionated. let people be and keep ya shit to ya self. if u really feel the need to justify yourself every minute of your existence then maybe you should have a good hard look at yourself, bitch!

#5 — April 14, 2006 @ 20:09PM — My Opinion, That's All

Scott! Jealous, aren't ya!

Yep, we Americans have it all. We have stuff, people, music, movies, TV, freedoms of every kind, patriotism, religion. Wow. We do have it all. I love being an American!

#6 — May 3, 2006 @ 18:50PM — Antoin Dargan

The dumbest opinions are always the loudest.

Intelligent media exists, but must be found.
Example: the Sunday Independent, an Irish paper.
I read it religiously because it constantly challenges the status quo and has a lot to say about the terminally messed up state of the our country due to our government's consistent incompetence and more to say about global affairs.
I very much recommend checking it out. Journalists such as Eoghan Harris, Brendan O' Connor, Eilis O' Hanlon, Gene Kerrigan come highly recommended.

#7 — September 13, 2006 @ 16:33PM — LiloiOpira

Helloeverybody

#8 — January 11, 2007 @ 15:48PM — Greg Ruth

I think this posting better illustrates misunderstanding, cultural difference, and miscommunication between the Americans and Eurpoeans.

Europeans, in general are better traveled then Americans, but like Americans when they travel they typically go to DisneyLand, not just a random city to talk to the locals. I think that if we all did the latter, even if only on the way to DisneyLand (or Eurodisney :-) we'd foster a stronger feeling of Global Community.

BTW. just in response to one post above. I think it's a falacy to belive that Europeans are "full of jealousy" about the US. Europe is series of developed nations, many with emenities we don't have in the U.S. (like good public transportation and universal healthcare), therefore they are justified in having nationalistic pride (same as us Americans do). The idea that they are better than us, just follows that mindset. It's harmless, and probably healthy for them to think of themselves as "better". Just like I believe the Flyers are a better hockey team, then say, the Ducks. :-) Go ahead and disagree.

#9 — October 9, 2008 @ 10:50AM — vic

america sucks and they are usually not man enough to admit and correct it. now because of their greed im suppose to suffer and pay for their indiscretion?

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