Dead Horse Beaten To Death: Clerks 2 Is A Comin'
Published August 28, 2004
And I assure you, I'm not kidding.
Why, Kevin, why?
You swore that Jay and Silent Bob was your last View Askew flick, that you were all growns up and going to focus on making different, more adult-type fare. And after seeing Jay And Silent Bob, I was pleased with your declaration. Between that flick and Dogma, it would have been a mercy killing. And now you've told AP that you've begun work on The Passion Of The Clerks, which sounds more like a subtitle to Scary Movie 4 than a legit project. Giving a movie a desperate title like that is grounds for public flogging in certain places, y'know.
So what gives? Sure, Jersey Girl was a miserable failure, but so what? You're going to punk out after giving it just one shot? When Orson Welles made flop after flop post-Citizen Kane, you didn't see him making an animated Kane show and a sequel, did you? No, he went the honorable route and kept on truckin' making a wide variety of flicks, followed by doing some embarrassing commercials once he was over the hill. Ahem. You're better than that, you big lug. Chasing Amy was solid and showed that you truly have the potential to break out of your self-imposed dungeon of making movies that appeal mostly to fifteen year olds.
Sadly, you're reminding me of Uncle Rico in Napoleon Dynamite. Remember how he was obsessed with his glory days and tried hopelessly to relive them instead of evolving? And how it only lead to misery and electrocution? Learn from the mistakes of Uncle Rico. He got zapped for your sins.
Here's a side note for all Napoleon Dynamite fans out there who are also children of the 80's: I just came to the shocking realization that Uncle Rico (Jon Gries) was Lazlo in Real Genius! Who knew?
Related tune: Too Much, Too Little, Too Late by Johnny Mathis and Deniece Williams (mp3 via hbronner.org)
Drew can be found mopping up unmentionable substances at Drew's Blog-O-Rama.
- Dead Horse Beaten To Death: Clerks 2 Is A Comin'
- Published: August 28, 2004
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- Section: Video
- Filed Under: Books: Comics and Graphic Novels, Culture: Humor and Satire, Video: Animation, Video: Comedy
- Writer: Drew Feinberg
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Comments on this articleComments
I think Kevin Smith should concentrate on writing and producing which are his strengths, rather than directing.
As for Clerks 2, he should do what other indie sequels do, hire a totally different group to make the sequel, which goes direct to DVD.
Jim, i think he's improving as a director. Jersey Girl was a world ahead of J&SBSB for example. But certainly writing is his primary talent, it would appear.
Ex-squeeze me Duke, but "Jersey Girl" was a pile of self-indulgent crap which couldn't even be saved by Ethan Slupee in a shit-demon costume.
I liked J&SBSB, and even got the Scream 3 and Miramax jokes. But outside his movies, Smith is just pandering, I mean, Leno? wtf? He can't get a gig with Letterman?
Though at least he knows how to use the web as moviepoopshoot.com and viewaskew.com show.
Oh come now Jim, Jersey Girl was nothing less than wonderful. I love all his other flicks too, including J&SBSB. Jersey Girl was one i approached cautiously, and ended up loving. I dunno, it just the ol' sentimental side fair on. Really moving and touching and all that jazz, but also very funny. Granted the Will Smith cameo seemed a tad indulgent, but i still enjoyed it. I actually kinda liked Smith after that.
Duke, and here I thought all your iterations of the phrase: "you old softy" dealt with decayed flesh and zombies.
I think he should still go on making movies like Dogma, Clerks, And all that other stuff cause itz funny.
okay im sorry but you used napolean dynamite to tank on clerks two? thats shameful, ND was a horrible movie. anyway what has history shown with most of kevins films? that the critics will slam them and then they will come out on dvd and do better then in theaters, case in point, clerks 1, then mallrats, and even j.a.s.s.b. so no matter what the critics say, kevin can do what he does best and his fans will stay loyal and draw in new ones with every movie he makes no matter if its jersey girl or clerks 2 (on a side note it is a good thing he dropped the other part of the title) us fans have his back.
i like how you said that he makes movies for 15 year old and then made a reference to Napoleon Dynamite
clerks 2 is so freaken awesome
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i dunno, man. This could just be yacking for the mean-time. He's talked for ages about doing another Jay and Bob thingy when Mewes sorts himself out, but i would have thought another Clerks would be a bit pointless. Wasn't everything more or less settled in Strike Back? I think Jersey Girl is a brilliant film, one of his top.3 (just behind Chasing Amy and Clerks). Hmm. Who knows what'll happen?