Orange Alert! High Alert!

Written by Garybibb
Published August 04, 2004

Well, those darned terrorist and their chatter are at it again. If you haven't seen the news at all, or if you live far away from the NY, or DC metro area, pretty much we are under lockdown. Seems some detailed intelligence suggests terrorists want to target financial institutions Washington, D.C., New York city and get ready for this. . .Newark, NJ.

Damnit I live 6-7 blocks away from Newark. It's bad enough that I was in NY when they blew up the towers, now they want to go back to NY and go right nest door to me as well. These feckin bastids don't give up do they?

I had to think to myself, why in the blue hell would they even bother going to Newark? Do they not realize that Newark in and of it's self is a warzone much like the middle east? 4 police officers have been shot there in the past month alone. Most of the neighborhoods look like something you would see in Iraq after a few bombs fell on the place. Only difference is the towns in Iraq were not bombed by the people who actually live in them, whereas Newark. . .

Then the nice reporter man on the news told me that the terrorist were targeting the Prudential Plaza building. Again i found myself thinking. . .There are actually big companies still left in Newark? Wow. Then they showed me a picture of it and i soon recognized it. Being that I have been driving past the Prudential Plaza alot recently doesn't make me feel all that comfortable either.

Now they are saying that the preferred means of attack would be car or truck bombs, maybe even carried out by women. Crikey.

The rush hour traffic is bad enough in Newark without having some terrorist fouling it up even more. A woman terrorist driver is twice as bad. She would be putting on her makeup so she would look good when the bomb went off, trying to get her 1241234 children in the backseat to be quiet, all the while driving with her knees. It would be awful x2.

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Orange Alert! High Alert!
Published: August 04, 2004
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Section: Politics
Filed Under: Culture: Humor and Satire
Writer: Garybibb
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Comments

#1 — August 4, 2004 @ 19:44PM — kuros

i am at the level blue
blue for boredom

#2 — August 5, 2004 @ 17:02PM — garybibb [URL]

Awwwww po' baby. You'll be ok one day, cheer up!

#3 — August 6, 2004 @ 00:08AM — RJ [URL]

They'll likely try an attack either in NYC or nearby during the GOP Convention. Newark is nearby. But then again, so is Hartford. And Philly. And Providence. And...

:-/

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