I am somewhat nonplussed about the appeal of Hilary Duff, but at least she isn't slutted out or anorexic, and her sort of normal charm may be just the right mojo for a movie called A Cinderella Story:

Cinderella never had it this bad. In A Cinderella Story - a twisted and hilarious update of the classic fairy tale - high school senior Sam Montgomery (HILARY DUFF) lives at the beck and call of her self-obsessed step-mother Fiona (JENNIFER COOLIDGE) and her sinfully wicked step-sisters, who treat her more like a servant than a member of the family.

With her sights set on attending Princeton, Sam finds her less-than-sparkling social life wonderfully complicated when she meets her prince charming online. But when her anonymous cyber soul mate turns out to be her high school's über-popular quarterback Austin Ames (CHAD MICHAEL MURRAY), Sam makes a mad dash back to reality, leaving her cell phone behind just before the clock strikes midnight.

Fearing rejection if her secret is revealed, Sam dodges Austin's efforts to discover the identity of his princess. Will Sam let fear hold her back, or will she find the courage to be herself and claim the life she's always wanted? Her chance at happily ever after depends on it.

Maybe it's Hilary's oddly crooked smile that unsettles me - anyway, if you're, like, a teenager or something, you may find it rather groovy to send a phone message from Hilary to a friend, or another human of some sort.

And in my position as omnipotent media figure, I have decided that Hilary's name should be changed to "Hilary Duffary," much as I changed a recently deceased legendary actor's name to "Gregory Peckory" - so be it.