Chalabi chucked!

Written by CW Fisher
Published May 20, 2004

Ch-alibi chucked!

Big strange: the man who wrote the script for George II's Iraq War II has been summarily dropped from U.S. favor.

Ahmed Chalabi, horse whisperer to Dick Cheney and later George Bush, Iraqi expatriot gone 40 years, teller of lies in conspiracy with other Iraqi nationals, and supplier of the now-famous prediction by Cheney that Americans would be greeted with flowers at the gates of Baghdad — yes, that Chalabi — is gone.

The Pentagon paid this chucklehead $340,000 a month for bad intelligence, the only kind we buy, apparently. In return, Chalabi gave us only good news.

His real goal, as everyone at the Pentagon, CIA and FBI suspected, was to be president of the new Iraq. The Bush Team never suspected this: rather, they knew it, were part of it, considered it a good idea to have our boy become president. The problem was Iraqi politics. Those pesky new Iraqis really hate the guy.

So Chalabi changed his tune. Uh oh. He said that Washington had to give Iraqis control of their oil revenue and security forces or the June 30 power transfer would be meaningless. He said the U.S. should give an interim government control over spending! Worse, that they should choose who serves and who commands their armed forces. As if Iraq was some sort of sovereign nation!

So he's gone.

This war is about money. About power and control. It's about Good and Evil. Chalibi knew all that. Why did he turn? Who's side was he on?

He said there'd be flowers, but we should have known. Opening ceremonies are never as bloody as the game itself. Anyway, the game was declared a victory shortly after kickoff. C'est la vie, Chalabi.

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Chalabi chucked!
Published: May 20, 2004
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Section: Culture
Writer: CW Fisher
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#1 — May 20, 2004 @ 15:36PM — Stash

How about this: Chalabi had fallen into disregard among the Iraqi people so, in order to boost his standing and keep their one and only friend in the running for President of Iraq, the Bush Administration staged this entire show? Diabolical, huh? Oh, wait... they're not that clever.

#2 — May 20, 2004 @ 15:37PM — Tom Johnson [URL]

This war is about money. About power and control.

Actually, if you really understood what you were saying, you said it yourself: it's really about making sure idiots like this guy don't put people like Saddam or his ilk back in power. It's pretty simple, but of course if you're looking for conspiracies, you can drum those up, too. As always, learning to really grasp and apply the concept of Occam's razor would help tremendously, but, sadly, it's just not as much fun as what conspiracy theorists dream up.

#3 — May 20, 2004 @ 16:02PM — Mac Diva [URL]

Chalabi, gone? But, has he really turned? His pattern is to rely on powerful sponsors and their money. Hard to imagine him going it alone.

#4 — May 20, 2004 @ 17:23PM — Shark

They found out Chalabi was Clinton in a disguise!

It's Clinton's fault!



#5 — May 21, 2004 @ 00:30AM — RJ Elliott [URL]

...Americans would be greeted with flowers at the gates of Baghdad...

We were, more or less. But only for about a week...

#6 — May 21, 2004 @ 02:06AM — Natalie Davis [URL]

This should teach everyone that it's dangerous to say things the Bushies don't like...

#7 — May 21, 2004 @ 02:19AM — Mac Diva [URL]

I'm leaning more in Stash's direction. If one is a stooge for the occupiers in an occupied country, it might be a good (but not great, who is kidding who?) idea to pretend to rebel against one's handlers for a while. Since Chalabi has no ethics, this cannot be a breach over that. Must be an effort to hoodwink or about the money.

#8 — May 21, 2004 @ 21:37PM — jack e. jett [URL]

this is a clear case of karma coming back to bite you in the ass. i just don't know who getting the ass bite....bushie or chalabi.

jack e. jett

#9 — May 22, 2004 @ 14:03PM — CW [URL]

Tom Johnson:

The conspiracy happened in 2000. Everything else is blowback and containment.

The Bushies are too transparent to pull off conspiracy. They're driven by ideology, and they believe they're doing the right things. Their power comes not from corporate "sponsorship," but from the Christian Taliban. This is the greater threat to America.

Religion trumps logic and messes up common sense, and when leaders get religion, watch out.

Only by seeing the world through the lens of a baby Christian, newly sober by the grace of God, is it possible to understand the mind and motivation of George W. Bush. He's like a wide-eyed toddler with an invisible friend who has all power and will do anything he asks if he just prays hard enough, which requires an earnest prayer-face.

Bush is new to his faith and grossly untutored in the textbook. He's one of the cheaters who read the last chapter first to see how the book ends. This is the kind of idiocy that turned the "Left Behind" series into an industry, creating in the process a voter bloc roughly the size of the Louisiana Purchase.

A "moral" majority evangelicized on apocolyptic writings is the moral equivilent of what's happening in the Muslim world, where nothing enters the political debate without first passing approval of the religionists.

Christianity is no longer a single religion but a multitude of sects and denominations, many of which draw from the Old Testament prophecies without the education to understand that their inclusion in Christian Bibles is to point to the divinity of the Christ, and there is very little Christ in the positions they tend to take.

For example, they are against abortion because they are for life which is only given by God and therefore cannot be rejected. But many are also for the death penalty, an act that judges with the authority of God and rejects life on its certainty.

It's a slippery slope, this killing business, even for those gentle murderers, the priests, mullahs and ministers who stir up the people and bring them to arms, as they've done in Fallujah and Waco.

All prophecy is self-fulfilling. Proof is abundant.

Prophecize Armageddon, you'll get it.

By the way, in case you missed it, we lost Iraq. We'll continue losing it until we figure it out.

Curt Fisher

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