The Best Sites On The Web, Week Beginning 10-05-2004

Written by Duke De Mondo
Published May 11, 2004

The Dukes Guide To The Webnet - Week Beginning 10 / 05 / 2004

This here articlet should have been up yesterday, but on account of The Duke spending the night listening to Eamon telling me to Fuck It and so on, it arrives a day late.

I'm sorry as all hell is what I am. Seriously. Kick my ass.

So what the hell are you waiting for, motherfucki? Get reading this here Guide To The Best Sites On The Web-Net, and increase your IQ by 6 gazillion nano-bytes or whatever the fuck you Americans use for mathematical calculations.

The "Are You A Homosexual" Questionnaire

The Duke is stumped, to tell you the truth. I don't know if this here is a joke or what the hell. It looks like it might be, and about half way through you're thinking, "Man, these are some witty motherfuckers is what. Taking the piss outta Christians! I mean, who would ever think of doing that?" and so on. But there are bits that just ooze authenticity.

What it is, is suggestions for how to answer a questionnaire that was apparently doing the rounds to try and combat homophobia in the youngsters. Thank Jehovah that this character by the name of Steve Van Nattan has supplied two sets of answers for each question, one for Elementary Students, and another one for Secondary and Middle School types.

The questionnaire attempts to subvert the old homophobia and so on by asking questions like "Do you think God caused your heterosexuality?" and such. A fine idea, as far as The Duke is concerned.

To the question - "Is it possible you are heterosexual because you fear the same sex?", the first of the supplied answers reads; "I am not afraid of any sinner who tries to make a sodomite of me. YOU ought to be afraid of my Dad who might find a way to take you to court for attacking my mind."

Good work, bigoted fuckwits. Or, if it's a joke, then Hah! I knew all along, motherfucker.

Unpopular Texts - Controversy And Context

This here appears to be a site created for use by "students" of some college or other, just by way of keeping with the scholarly themes above. What this is, is a series of links to resources what deal with the stuff folks like to throw in a big bonfire, or petition against, or tear all the pages out of in the public library.

Vandalism, motherfucker.

So we get great resources on the likes of The Turner Diaries, a Neo-Nazi scumfest what deals with a race war and so on, and you can even download the book, although you may have to put up with some fascist motherfuckers trying to hock you some WWII memorabilia while you're at it.

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The Duke (Aaron McMullan to his parents and the clergy) is a Northern Irish writer, performer and insomniac currently residing in London. He is the creator of Mondo Irlando, wherein his scribblings and hollerings can be found. He is currently working towards the completion of his first novel, and his debut "punk / country / folk / whatever" album has recently been released by Ex Libris Records . You can also pop by His MySpace Page and maybe have a coffee and a biscuit.
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The Best Sites On The Web, Week Beginning 10-05-2004
Published: May 11, 2004
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Section: Sci/Tech
Filed Under: Culture: Humor and Satire, Sci/Tech: Internet, Culture: Media
Writer: Duke De Mondo
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