Child Prodigy
Published March 22, 2004
Admittedly, it's a dry read at best, but you'd think it would at least put her to sleep. God knows, it worked for me.
As I listened to the news story about this 14-year-old showoff, they reported that young Alia was talking and reading by the time she was eight-months-old and graduated from high school when she was ten. On the television, they showed the teenage Alia working in a high-tech laboratory surrounded by electronic gizmos that would have been equally at home in the space shuttle. It was then that I was suddenly pelted in the face by a raisin. I glanced down at Mary Ellen sitting on the floor in front of me. She was flailing the box of raisins wildly in one hand, its contents being flung about the living room, and was using the other hand to stuff a raisin in her ear. The expression of grim determination on her little face seemed to imply she knew exactly what she was doing. The likelihood of her entering medical school at an early age was slowly being replaced with the very real possibility she'd end up dropping out of college to become a fulltime street performance artist. Or worse, a Senator.
I sighed.
"C'mere, you," I called to her. Mary Ellen looked in my direction, a tiny finger still trying to cram one more raisin in her ear. I smiled and wiggled my hands at her and she grinned in reply, then stood up, and with her pink teddy bear under her arm, waddled over to me.
She crawled into my lap and squirmed her way into a comfortable position (thumb in mouth, teddy bear to chest) and I draped a Winnie the Pooh blanket over her. Looking down, I softly said, "Please, for God's sake, whatever you do, don't come home from college and tell me you're majoring in Art History or Women's Studies."
Call it coincidental, but as she closed her eyes, Mary Ellen took the hand wrapped around the teddy bear and placed it on her forehead, presenting me with an unmistakable hand gesture. She was giving me the finger. I smiled warmly and hugged her close, knowing my precious little girl would grow up to be a fine young woman.
- Child Prodigy
- Published: March 22, 2004
- Type:
- Section: Culture
- Writer: Tom Norris
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Comments on this articleComments
The exclamation point is indeed impressive!
Our three-month-old speaks farsi.
Or at least something that sounds like farsi.
Nice piece, Tom. (cute baby, too, but in one of your website photos, you look like you just stepped off a plow; oh, I just noticed where you're from; nevermind...)
"Ask me about my Grandson!" --- Shark
Personal anecdote warning:
at the park the other day, my 3 yr old grandson saw his first pair of identical twins; two little girls in identical pink outfits walking side by side.
He looked shocked and amazed, then he said, "Papa, look, she's got two heads!"
I love that.
I told my son there was lots of salt in the ocean. He thought it over a minute and asked me if there was any pepper?
LOL!
Here's one from a kid I babysat many, many moons ago:
Sees "heavyset" woman with large tummy. Asks, "Mommy, what's in her tummy?" Mommy says, "There's a baby in there! She's going to have a baby soon." Kid says, "Oh. Then what's in her legs?"
Okay, so Tom's 14-month old stuck raisins in her ear this morning. Normal for the age.
I just caught my 3-year-old son sticking a Skittle in his ear. And when I took it out, he was already trying to shove another one up his nose.
Never switch states from where they know you.
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"Uh oh" is the BEST first word, because they usually use it correctly.
There's hope for med school yet. My five-year-old wrote a note this morning, and she used an exclamation point correctly! [like that]
I'm tellin' ya, it's the little things that make a parent proud. Harvard, here she comes.